The Kai Complex

On Sunblocks.

2011-06-20T16:03:00.005+08:00

BEFORE

AFTER! Excuse my face here. Haha;)

I swear to God I will invest on a more trusted brand of sunblock next time. I don't know what has gotten into me during this trip that I bought a really cheap sunblock for myself and what's worse, I had the kindness to share them to my friends. Ayun tuloy, we all had a really really bad burn. Tsk tsk.

Right after my Siquijor trip. Cebu Blog Camp 2011 with Mica. Ako na ang negra! #mealready

I should've known better. My derma has been telling me to take care of my skin, especially my face, because I have tiena versicolor, a dermotoligical disorder. This condition is fairly common and is caused by the fungus pityrosporum ovale (a type of yeast occurring on the skin). Extreme heat causes this disorder to the skin. In short, hindi ako pwede magbabad sa init pero matigas ang ulo ko. #meronbangmalambotnaulo?

Well in the picture above, it isn't very obvious yet but after a day or two, a few white spots started to appear on my face and before I knew it, I have it in my arms too! Sobrang bilis kumalat ng pesteng fungus na 'to. I have to go back to step 1 again do all the face rituals I used to do before.

Hindi naman talaga ako maputi naturally pero sobrang itim ko lang talaga ngayon. This picture was taken with M, right before the Siqui trip. Please compare with the photo above.

So guys, please please please don't jeopardize your skin's health by buying the right sunblock for your skin type. Oh well. Lesson learned!

The Isla del Fuego Experience

2011-06-18T15:36:00.004+08:00

My friends I were so desperate for a summer getaway adventure and so we planned and planned on where to go. We had a few choices but we ended up choosing Siquijor (Isla del Fuego) because most of them haven't gone there yet. The plan was somehow concrete already and then most of my friends backed out (because one had to go home to her province, the other one had work, the other one had a Civil Service exam the following day, [insert more reasons here!]). And so I was left with RJ who was really willing to go on with the plan with me.

Both of us were really itching to go to Siquijor and so we adjusted our plan because this time, only the two of us are going. Just when we had really really concrete plans, Andrea decided to join us. Haha! So there were three of us already. Yay!

Since RJ was in Cebu, he had to travel from Cebu to Dumaguete, then together with me and Andrea, we travelled from Dumaguete to Siquijor through Delta. Fare is Php 140 + Php 15 (terminal fee).

RJ and I at the Dumaguete port terminal

RJ and I at the Delta terminal

There's our Delta! :)

Me, Andrea and RJ. All smiles! Right before we discovered Delta's aircon was busted! Super INIT!

We were all giddy as we stepped foot inside the Delta fast ferry. Super excited to go to Siquijor. Although it wasn't my first time there (HELLO?), but it was my first time to be with RJ and Andrea (Sila na ang first timers sa Siquijor!).

Upon arriving in the port of Siquijor, a trike driver came up to us and offered his service. We asked him how much it would cost us to go to Salagdoong Beach, which is in Maria - three towns away from Siquijor, Siquijor. We finally agreed on Php 400. That's already expensive for a trike ride but we agreed on such price because we knew we're going to have a lot of stop overs because we still had to buy a lot of stuff (a.k.a. ba-on) and we also had to go to the pier in Larena because RJ had to buy his ticket (Siqujor-Cebu) for the following day.

There's our small trike! In case you need a tour guide or trike, just contact Kuya IP at 09272633983. He's really nice and kind to us but PLEASE HAGGLE WITH HIM. You should also ask him (or the trike driver you chose) to pick you up from Salagdoong on the day of your departure.

RJ buying some more ba-on for our Salagdoong trip.

The way to Salagdoong Beach from the high way. Parang yung man-made forest ng Bohol. :)

It took us about 1 hour and 30 minutes (including the stop overs) to finally get to Salagdoong Beach. We were so ready to hit the beach but we had to set up our tent first and cook lunch. You can rent tents there so no need to worry if you don't have one or if you're too tamad to bring one. A small tent (good for 3 people) costs Php 300 only. That's just Php 100 per person/night. :) I think they also have a big tent that is good for 5-6 people which costs Php 500. Not sure with that though. We also rented a table (with 4 plastic chairs) for Php 50/day.

Andrea with our tent and our table. Camping na ito!

If you have noticed in the picture above, we brought a cooler with us. Haha:) It was really a brilliant idea because we stayed at the beach shore the whole time! So in case you go there, PLEASE DO BRING A COOLER with you for your ice cubes. You can actually buy ice cubes at the canteen of Salagdoong Beach, but we were too tamad to go there back and fourth just for ice so we hoarded! Haha.

So after we got settled with our tent and stuff, we started cooking our lunch. Yes, we brought raw meat and grilled it there. There's actually food in the canteen but we were just paranoid. The next day, we were too lazy to cook and decided to order food in the canteen nalang. Haha:) After we had our lunch, the inuman has begun at 2 in the afternoon. Drinks (alco and non-alco) are sold at the canteen too, but we just had to bring our own Jagermeister. We bought our beers at the canteen though. San Mig Light at Php39.

Jager test tube shots.

We went swimming from afternoon till night time. We had to make the most of our time there and since that was what we wanted (BEACH!), so go na sa swimming! Haha:) Night time came and we had dinner at the sand. We ate the remaining food we had from lunch and some canned goods we brought. Then the inuman continued.

The 3B essentials pag pupunta ng beach: Baraha, Beer, and Banig (wala kaming banig so sarong nalang) Haha:)

Light drawing. SIQ... UIJOR. Haha:)

Our attempt for a jumpshot. Omg J, your legs are so tiny wtf!

Salamat sa tripod! Haha:)

Rj playing with my poi. :)

The next day, it rained very hard WTF so me and Andrea woke up very early. Like 5:30am early! We couldn't go back to sleep anymore so we decided to go swimming. Salagdoong has a really amazing sunrise but we weren't able to witness that because of the rain. Boohoo. Rj woke up at around 9 already.

Beer for me at 5:30 in the morning. Yayyy! Nothing beats morning beer! :)

We had the whole morning to enjoy the beach for ourselves, because the place started to get crowded during noon time. It was a sunday kasi. I suggest bakasyonistas to go there during weekdays if you want a more peaceful outing. :)

The whole Salagdoong to ourselves...

...but it got really crowded come lunch time.

The slide to the open sea!

Salamat sa tripod again! Haha:)

In the afternoon, we went home to Pop's house in the 'bayan' to wash up and rest since RJ was already leaving in the evening while Andrea and I decided to leave the following day since there were no trips to Dumaguete already.

Dead tired from the beach.

We just had to withdraw. Haha;) Yes, there's an ATM in the bayan. :)

So that's probably it - the whole of our weekend getaway to Siquijor! Hahah. Too little time, I know. We wanted to tour around the island and see the whole of Siquijor but we had no enough time. Well maybe next time, yeah? :)

SIQUIJOR AYOS!

The Pocket God Update.

2011-06-03T00:32:00.001+08:00

WOW. It's been almost four months since I wrote something here. That long? I focused more on my food blog lately because I really really think it needs more of my time and attention. Don't you think so too?

Sooo anyways, the Team O went to Bacolod City last April and it was helluva fun! It's been months since we had a not-so out of town trip and I was so excited to attend Les' thanksgiving party in Bacolod because it was a good excuse to kick-off the summer season. In case you wonder, here's a detailed entry on how to go to Bacolod from Dumaguete City.

As soon as we set foot on the City of Smiles, the Dumaguete delegation got reunited with the Bacolod and Cebu delegation. It was fun to catch up with them over good food courtesy of Pao at the Carribean Waterpark and Resotel.

Team O at the Carribean Waterpark and Resotel

After the orgasmic lunch courtesy of Pao, we went to Calea (which I haven't blogged about yet) to have desserts. Well, what's going to Bacolod without visiting Calea, right? Everything we ordered were mouth-watering and I am seriously salivating right now! Nom.

So night time came and it was already time for Les' thanksgiving party, but we still went to The Ruins (Talisay City). It's about 30 minutes away from Bacolod City. Entrance fee is Php 40.

The Ruins showcases what is left of the Don Mariano Ledesma Lacson Ancestral Home in Talisay City, Negros Occidental. During its heyday, the mansion was the largest residential structure ever built. It boasted of its garden of lilies in and around the four-tiered fountain on the mansion’s front lawn and the finest furniture, chinaware and decorative items that its owners brought from their travels across Europe and Asia. Read more

The Ruins

After the sight-seeing and picture-taking moments at The Ruins, we proceeded to Les' party at some clubhouse back in Bacolod. Although we were late but what's important is we were there to celebrate that special moment with Les. Haha labo much? :) The party was sooo fun that I forgot most parts of it. Mahaha:)

This trip to Bacolod is probably one of the most unforgettable trips of my life so far. :)

Tinta 2011: Dumaguete's First Tattoo Expo

2011-02-27T20:07:00.001+08:00

Last night, we were given complimentary tickets for the Tinta 2011, Dumaguete’s very first Tattoo Expo. The event was held at Hayahay Treehouse Bar and there were a lot of cool bands who played that night: Finpot, Spacepets, Ground Zero – all are Dumaguete’s pride; and of course the main band for the night: Powerspoonz from Cebu City.

While the bands were entertaining us with their beat, at the back were the Tattoo Artists’ stations. If my memory is right, there were 5 Tattoo Artists and to name a few were Oliver and Dino from BlackRose Tattoo shop and of course, the man himself, Ricky Sta. Ana. Wooot!

Here are some pictures I took from the Tinta 2011: Dumaguete's First Tattoo Expo event.

Meanwhile, at the Tattoo Artists' station...

I hope that this would be an annual event because it was really fun! And maybe I can get my very first tattoo next year, yeah? \m/

Twenty-Seven.

2011-02-08T08:13:00.003+08:00

It’s one of those days. I don't know, but I just feel like everything in this world is ganging up on me. I know I still have a lot of issues to settle and instead of moving my ass right now, here I am, laying down on my bed, blogging. Well, at least I’m somehow trying to be productive, right? And besides, it’s too early yet. Excuses, excuses. I never ran out of them.

The ‘issues’ just kept coming one after the other and I just feel like bursting anytime soon. I must say, this has been the most down point of my life, next to that thing that happened on the summer of 2003. The sad part here is, I have no one to talk to right now. No, let me rephrase that. I don’t want to talk to anyone about it right now. Why? Well maybe because I’m really not that type of a person where I spill everything out. After all I’ve went through, I have proved to myself that people can be very judgmental. Thus, if you don’t want to be judged, then don’t just blab to everyone about everything. People really don’t care about it or worse, they’d even be happy that you’re having an effed up life.

I have been judged and misjudged several times and up to this very day, they keep haunting the crap out of me. Every time I think about those moments, I still can’t imagine how I was able to handle it. But the important thing is that I was able to shrug it off and move on. I mean, what else is there to do but to keep the past behind and just wish those mothersuckers karma. Bad karma to them, please.

So going back, I just wish I have someone to talk to right now. Maybe a friend who wouldn’t say something like “It’s your fault” or some sort. You see, that is also the reason why I really don’t open up to friends or even family because everything that comes out of their mouth are words that I don’t want to hear. I feel awful for crying out loud, you guys don’t have to squeeze some lime to the open wound. I just want to hear the things I want to hear because yes, I am a stubborn child of God for Christ’s sake.

As of this moment, there is a folder, hidden somewhere, that contains 27 write-ups of unexpressed and unsaid feelings. At least, writing them keeps me sane.

Over The Weekend.

2011-01-25T21:53:00.000+08:00

Last weekend, I went to Bacolod City. I wanted to do a lot of stuff there but I knew I only had limited time so I made sure to make the most out of my very short visit there and that includes, of course, visiting Les. :-)

On my way to Bacolod, somewhere in Binalbagan, I think. A truck right in front of the car met an accident which caused traffic.

As soon as I step foot at the City of Smiles, I met up with Les at Enting’s. Of course, what’s a visit to Bacolod without eating at Enting’s, right? [Read Food Blog entry here] After having a very heavy lunch there, we then went to Robinson’s (with Les’ friends, Camille and Mac) to eat again. We had ice cream cake, Mexican Munchies and Fries from Taters (NOMNOM), and coffee at Bob’s.

The four hours I spent with Les and her friends wasn’t enough for us to catch up, but it was good to see her again.

I am hoping to go back to Bacolod any time soon. I am really fascinated with the City and everything in it, especially the people. ♥

On Happiness.

2011-01-16T19:31:00.001+08:00

For a while you think that everything’s perfect, and that there’s nothing more you could ever want. But then you realize that it’s not how things should be. Reality is far from what we imagine. Sweet. Unpredictable. Cruel. You never know what to expect. “Life is like a box of chocolates,” Forrest Gump said. “You never know what you’re gonna get.” But chocolate, like everything else, doesn’t last.

I was so happy that day, laughing by his side. Everything seemed so perfect. It felt so different. So inevitable. For the first time, I truly felt alive, not knowing how the roots underneath were slowly dying. I revel in each moment, oblivious to the nothingness that awaits.

Why is it that each time that I am happy, I seem to pay the price with my tears? Is it because I don’t deserve to be happy? Because I’m simply unworthy? Don’t I deserve such gift like everyone else?

I have long reconciled with the fact that death would be the final payment for the debts that I owe, for the life I’ve lived, and for the memories that make me who I am. But must I take each breath of joy incompletely, knowing that pain’s unrelenting embrace awaits, as I lay shivering at the chill of the knowledge of being unworthy? Nothing is without a price after all. What we think is free has already been paid for by someone else’s tears.

I ask these questions in silence, while drowning in the fact of being alone.

He doesn’t understand. I am but the razor to make him see the truth. And I am afraid that my words might shatter his soul… and the life he gave to me.

To bathe in the glory of happiness and fulfillment, and to be pierced by daggers of ice not long after I’ve tasted the sweetness. We all live in borrowed happiness, each second fleeting, leaving you with an emptiness so full at its wake. I sit here paralyzed and unable to grasp its real meaning, not knowing how to stop hurting myself. Wanting to stay away from you yet having no courage to walk. I need to go… to shield myself from the pain that you are causing. But leaving would mean my death. My life's end. The vows we kept, the promises made, and dreams envisioned shall fade in a blur. No longer living, but not yet dead.

Forever didn’t exist.

Forever was a dream, something one could never grasp.

I would never know whether I was wrong to believe in something so unreal as death lurks in every corner, stalking its prey. The death of life and the death of hope. But with you, I believed in the happiness of living.

I believed in us.

Those fairy tales did have a semblance of reality after all. Only that life’s stories end in many ways. Among the many boxes on the storyboard, the last one always ends up torn.

For fate to bring us together and hate to tear us apart, I could never understand. I had the chocolate in my hands, but somehow along the way, a realization that too much of it can make me feel sick.

“God is a comedian, playing to an audience too afraid to laugh."

HNY: 11 Goals for 2011.

2011-01-02T00:59:00.002+08:00

Somewhere at the last week of 2010, I said I already gave up on love, life, and luck. But honestly, I would still want to cling to that little hope I have inside me that 2011 is a good year for me. This year, I gave myself a memorandum because if not, I’d still end up as KamilleVersion2010. I know I have been saying this every year but this time, I really mean it. I want to be a better person this 2011.

The reason why my 2010 was effed up is maybe because I didn’t set any goals. Don’t you think? So this year, I’m setting goals for myself just because.

So here are my TO-DOs for 2011:

1. Invest on books. This year, I promised myself that I will feed my brain. In 2010, the only book I finished reading was Jemima J. It’s a novel about ugly ducklings and swans. Nice read, btw. So yeah, this year, I want to expand my brain’s library. I can’t make excuses this time, like “the bookstore is out of my way” blah blah blah, because there’s always eBooks! READ.

2. Go to places. Every year, I make it a point that I get to visit another place – one place, at least. This year, I am hoping to go to more places and discover more amazing cities, provinces, and maybe countries! Yayyy!

3. Get a decent camera. I have been saving for this but every time I have the money to buy one, I end up spending it with other things. But this year, I am really determined to get a camera of my own. I can’t be leeching my Mom’s camera forever, right?

4. Save money. Yeah, so I can do #s 1, 2, and 3. ENOUGH SAID! :)

5. Blog. This year, I will do my best to take blogging seriously. Like more seriously that ever! Maybe be more active in the blogosphere, yeah? And attend blogging events to broaden my knowledge about, of course, blogging. This year, I am hoping I could put up a FOOD BLOG, which is my long-time dream. *fingers crossed*

6. Meet new people. I am hoping I get to meet lots and lots of amazing people this year, especially bloggers. Along with that, I also want to keep the ones that are worth keeping. You know, strengthen the ties and maybe rekindle old bonds? Hihi. It really feels good to be surrounded with friends and nice people so I’m looking forward to more friends this year!

7. Love life. Ok, scratch that. I am not asking for the big L this year because as far as I can remember, I have been anticipating this every year but it doesn’t really come along. As they say, muntik ng mahapit. LOL. Well, if it comes, it comes.

8. Healthy living. By that, I mean, losing weight! Haha. This is the first time I set this thing to a goal. I have always been proud of me being big but this time, I need to lose some pounds. REALLY. Let’s say for health reasons. ;-) So in line with this, I want to eat the healthy way. I really love good food and I know I have the tongue for superb dishes so I don’t know if I can stop myself from diving in. Well maybe the word here is just CONTROL. Agree? Let’s see if I can really hold back on this. I also want to cut down on my alcohol intake. I have always been the defending champion in the inumans because, sad to say, I ~~seldom~~ do not get drunk anymore. Over the years, my dosage for alcohol has hit the highest level, thus my body is now immune to it. FYI: But I’m no alcoholic!

9. Finish school. Yayyy! I know I’m way past my “due date”, that is why I really have to get this done and over with. :-)

10. Get a real job. Right after #9, I need to be independent and get a real job. I can’t be working online forever. I need SSS, PhilHealth, Pag-ibig, etc! LOL. But seriously, I miss how it felt like to be working in the real corporate world. FYI: I was once a call-girl! Hello, thank you for calling!

11. Get a place of my own. If lucky enough, I want to move out from our house. Not that I really want to stay away from my family but how can I be independent if I still live with them, right? I need to practice myself. Regarding #10, who knows, I might be working outside Dumaguete or even outside the Visayas region? That is why I need to experience being independent.

There, there. I have 11 major –major goals to accomplish. 11 goals for 2011. Yebaaah! I hope I will meet all these goals for this year and I’m pretty much excited to see the outcome but I will take it one day at a time. I easily have, more or less, 365 days to accomplish these goals. So let’s get it on!

Cebu And Friends.

2010-12-16T00:32:00.002+08:00

This picture was taken some time last week in Chopstick Restaurant, IT Park. I went to Cebu City to visit my friends and cousin, and of course, to take a quick escape from reality here in Duma. HAHA:) Anyhoo, I posted this picture because I miss them already and I miss having foodtrips with them. Wala lang. ♥

Mobile McDonalds.

2010-12-14T22:54:00.003+08:00

*Click the picture for a larger view*

I have yet to try this one! McDonalds, you never fail to amaze me! Thank you, Nuffnang, for the heads up! :)

Halloween 2010.

2010-10-31T16:39:00.000+08:00

So it's the time of the year when anyone can dress up anything they like. Of course, it's HALLOWEEN! This occasion can be the best excuse to go out-of-fashion or some sort. Haha. :)

This year, me and my cuzzos dressed up as CHUZZLES!

We already passed the stage where we'd dress up as white ladies or ghosts. HAHA. No bloody/scary faces for Halloween 2010! :) We didn't go trick or treating anymore because we felt that we were too old for that already and in this little city, I bet no one would take us seriously. Specially with the hair. Haha. We had fun at the costume party held at home.

And so... I will leave you with this very, very cute CHUZZLE, mmmkay? Don't laugh.
Now you can laugh as hard as you can. =))

Going Japanese.

2010-10-03T04:12:00.006+08:00

Tonight, I had the most AWESOME dinner of my life, so far! LOL We wanted to have some Japanese food but I guess we were too lazy to go out so my Tita had this brilliant idea of ordering food from Mifune Japanese Restaurant. It's the best take-out food I've ever had! The long board of Japanese food was unbelievable!

It's actually good for 10-15 famished people.

Mifune Japanese Restaurant is owned and managed by a Japanese so it's really damn good authentic Japanese food. The whole board costs around Php 2,700. Not too pricey actually. You can never go wrong with this for parties, feasts, or when you just feel going for some authentic and superb Japanese food.

Mifune Japanese Restaurant is situated in Sta. Catalina street, Dumaguete City. Just so you know, their place doesn't have the ambiance and all that sooo yeah. It's just really good food, men! :)

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back.

2010-09-14T04:55:00.012+08:00

Dear future boyfriend,

Where are you now and what’s taking you so long to find me? Well it’s not that I’m so eager to fall in love with you but don’t you think I’ve waited long enough? It’s been quite some time now and I’ve been waiting for you to come and surprise me with your overwhelming love. I am so thrilled thinking that soon enough, someone like you will come to my life and love me no matter what I am – what I was. You will love me so much that you would just find yourself in tears because of the overflowing love you have for me. And I would just be besieged with the happiness that I will feel because finally, you happened. I just miss how it feels like to be loved and cared for. I can hardly wait to meet you. Really.

Who are you? I wish I would know as early as now so that I could prepare myself, because I don’t think I can afford to have another failed relationship in the future. Oh no, not too soon. I just want to be ready because I want us to be right. I want to be the perfect girlfriend for you, sans telling me what to do. I want you to be the luckiest guy in this world for having me beside you all the time.

Are you my friend’s brother? The hot classmate of mine from my Literature class? The law student I’ve been crushing on since first year college? The handsome gay seatmate of mine? The guy from the cheering team I’ve been checking out since last year? My friend’s ex? My friend? Someone I know for so long? Or perhaps you're someone I haven't met yet? There are so many possible people I could think of and I can just go on and on with my list of probabilities. But sad to say, no matter how I try, it’s yet too early to tell who you really are.

I just want to let you know that no matter who you’ll be, once I feel that tangy feeling for you, I will try my best to keep you – whatever it’ll take. I must admit, I am never really good in relationships but I know that when the right person will come, there will be no such thing as “good” or “expert” in relationships anymore because I’ve learned that it’s never a one-way affair. Give and take, as they say. I am much more willing to learn this cycle with you soon.

In God’s time, I know I will meet you, become my friend, and eventually, fall in love with you, and this may sound like cheese curls, but I really hope we’ll live happily ever after. Hahaha. Too soon for me to say that, I know. Well you might think I’m some hopeless romantic girl writing a letter to someone she doesn’t even have any idea who, but what I want you to know is that when our perfect time comes, I will let you read this so that you will be aware that on this very day, I was hoping that somewhere along my life’s journey, I wished for someone like you to come along. I will also be reading this to myself again, so that every time I will see your face smiling back at me, I will be constantly reminded of a wish that was granted.

Come and find me now,
Your future girlfriend

Oh Well.

2010-08-17T03:43:00.003+08:00

It was 2001 when I met my bud’s older brother, Ton. I was 15 then, he was 19. An unnoticeable high school girl having some crush with a campus crush college dude. I was like reaching for the stars.

But fate was kind to me. We eventually became friends as well and constant textmates. He was giving me advices and all that, but I thought he was lame because he was treating me like a younger sister. But who was I to complain? Having my name and number stored in his phone's contacts was more than even enough! He was my dream boy…

Until he became my boyfriend on October 21, 2002.

The next four months weren’t easy at all. I had to deal with all the girls that would follow him wherever he went, the girls that would text and call him all the time. I had to deal with him being in college and I, still in high school. I had to deal with his crazy schedule and never-ending studyouts with other girls.

He had to deal with my immaturity.

On February 18, 2003, we finally took time apart. It was my immaturity, according to him, that brought us to that situation. I didn’t ask him to stay longer anymore, because he wanted space and time alone and I can not force that.

He broke my fragile heart.

I wouldn’t deny that I was bitter with him. I can’t imagine how easy it was for him to move on, how he was able to just smile and just laugh it off every time someone would pop the “WHY?” question regarding the break up. It was too casual for him, and there I was, about to take a quick escape from the world because I was hurt too much.

But we remained good friends.

Because I had no choice. We belong in one circle. He’s my friend’s brother, my friends’ friend, ~~my boyfriend~~. Meaning, I get to see him on parties, I get to hang out with him, I get to text him, ~~I get to hug and kiss him and tell him how much I still love him~~. I’m not quite sure if it was a help for my recovery but I was pretty sure with one thing — that I am happy I still get to see and talk to him whenever I want to.

Fast forward to today, June 9, 2010. I am blogging this because I can’t deny the fact that I still have feelings for him and that I would trade everything I have just to have him back. It’s been seven long years since we’ve broken up, and in those years, I never doubted my feelings for him. I never doubted that it’s still him that I want.

It’s absolutely crazy, I know, but there’s this inch of me that’s been hoping that we’d get back together, maybe not now, but hopefully soon. You know that feeling that even at the end of the day, it's still him you think about, you care about. That when you're alone, all you think is him, what he's doing, where he is. That when you see him with someone else, you stare at them and imagine it was you who he's with. That when you remember happy thoughts with him, you ask yourself "What if it's still us?". That after a failed relationship, it's still him you want to have back, and not whoever.

That all you ever want to write in your Christmas wishlist is his name.

Oh well, this feeling brings me back when I was still in high school. Back when he was just a crush and I was someone reaching for the stars. A big shiny star. :)

OMG. Seven longfnckingcrap years? Seriously now?

My Top 10 Emerging Influential Blogs For 2010.

2010-08-10T00:17:00.005+08:00

It's already the 4th year of this writing project, but this is the first time that I will be casting my votes. I admit I was totally anti-social with other blogs before, maybe that's why I didn't care about them that much. But this time, I realize that I shouldn't just leave these amazing blogs unnoticed.
So here's my Top 10 Emerging Influential Blogs for 2010:

1. Rabsing - Ricky is a personal friend of mine way before he started blogging. I believe it was I who introduced blogging to him and I can't believe how far he's gone in the blogosphere. I am truly proud of him and his passion to sing. I've seen him sing live during school activities before but you must agree that he has brought his singing career to the next level! Rabsing.com is the only singing blog I know! (Is there such thing as a "singing blog", by the way? Lulzzz)
2. Libotero - I would love to travel only if I had the time and the extra moolah for it. But unfortunately, I don't! Haha:) This blog helps me to, somehow, "experience" and "feel" other places in the Philippines by reading the entries and looking at the amazing pictures.
3. EverythingUbec - Well I frequent Cebu because aside from the fact that it's one of the nearest island to Negros, I think it's really an amazing island. You can find almost everything that's next to paradise in that wonderful island. I go to the city if I feel like getting myself into a fast-pacing busy life, or I can go down south where the mystical falls are located, or I could drive up north to give myself a treat to some relaxing beach. Thus, this island is really really close to my heart. Now in this site, I find most of Cebu City's latest happenings - what's in and what's not. Nice!
4. Project52Weeks - This videoblog is owned by one of the bloggers that I look up to, Micamyx. I must say that this blog has a unique way of documenting 2010 because it will showcase 52 short videos by Micamyx. Cool, isn't it?
5. WhenInManila - This events blog basically features everything in Manila - from food to nightlife to events and other cool stuff! I see this blog's name everywhere in the blogosphere. Thus, this blog is really really influential. Don't you think eh?
6. GandaEverSoMuch - Sa name pa lang ng blog, it'll make you smile already. Well this blog makes me chuckle every time I visit it. This personal blog is owned by a blogger named Orman whose humor is unbelievable, in a good way! :)
7. Nomnomclub - Being a food enthusiast that I am, I just can't leave food blogs unnoticed. Lulzzz!:) This particular food blog is one of my favorites because there's humor, amazing write-up, and very very effective pictures! Every time I visit thie blog, it'll either make me salivate or it'll make me say "Nomnom, ong sorop nomon!"
8. PigginOutSessions - This is another amazing food blog that I know of. The entries are usually about food events or dishes that are found in Cebu City. The write-ups are exceptional since the blogger writes for a local mag/paper and mind you, his photos are equally as amazing as his write ups since I believe he's a photographer as well. Side note: the blogger is ~~yummy~~ a Cebuano -- his name is Doyzkie. Hahaha:)
9. KusinaMaria - As what I've mentioned, I love to eat! I love everything about food. This food blog showcases different recipes by Ria Jose and it features different entrees and desserts too. She also gives tips and tricks on cooking, baking, etc. This food blog, I must say, is the bomb! :)
10. FatGirlNoMore - Contrary to the fact that I am a food enthusiast, I also want to lose some weight. I totally feel the blogger of this blog, because I'm also going through what she's experiencing as an overweight. It isn't easy you know, and it'll never be. I know because I also have to deal with life's challenges and obstacles of being obese. This blog is truly a guide and an inspiration to me. :)

This writing project will not be possible without the support of sponsors such as Events and Corporate Video, Budget hotel in Makati, Pinoy Party Food, Copyediting Services, PR Agency Philippines, Budget Travel Philippines, Send Gifts to the Philippines, Black Friday Deals, Roomrent - units for rent, Search Profile Index, and Corporate Events Organizer.

My Very First.

2010-08-02T12:47:00.007+08:00

Well as they say, there's always a FIRST to everything! Sooo yeah, I just had my very first experience as a symposium speaker. I was asked if I could share my little knowledge about the latest trends of the internet to the special science class of Demetrio L. Alviola National High School (DLANHS), Bindoy, Negros Oriental. How could I say no to the kids?
So first, I talked about Social Networking Sites - categories, advantages, disadvantages, examples, etc. I didn't have a hard time explaining this to them since almost everyone is aware of Social Networking Sites. I only helped them broaden their knowledge about it.
The second part of my talk was BLOGGING 101. It was all about the basics of blogging - what's a blog, how does it work, and all that. You see, we can't deny that blogging has become one of the most influential trend on the world wide web these days and I am very proud to be a part of the blogging community, so sharing my itsy bitsy knowledge about blogging to the special science class of Demetrio L. Alviola National High School (DLANHS) was really, and I mean REEEAAALLY, my privilege.

When In Dumaguete.

2010-07-07T03:25:00.010+08:00

Last May, my BFF Jizzy from Cebu came to Dumaguete City for a quick visit. She actually studied her 3 years in high school here so she's quite familiar with the places around. Since it was her first visit after so long, I brought her to one of my fave places in the Ghetto (our term for Dumaguete --> Dumaghetto).

We had lunch at Gabby's Bistro which is, by the way, just a block away from my house. The bistro is located at Florentina Homes, Rovira Road. Their food is superb and not pricey at all! The ambiance is amazing, and I just love EVERYTHING about Gabby's Bistro. This is the best place to go to have fun dining and experience an unbelievably amazing ambiance.

Chips and dip -- the chips are very thin crisp. Yum!

Mozzarella sticks -- this is very very very yum! The herby dip goes well with the sticks!

Calamares/Squid Rings -- one of the best in town!

Pork Parmigiana -- breaded pork topped with cheese. This is really good too!

Baby Back Ribs -- one of the house's specialty. This is really really really, and I mean REALLY, good! You can never go wrong with this! :)

Gabby's Bistro
Florentina Homes, Rovira Road,
Bantayan, Dumaguete City
+63-35 422-0827
http://florentinahomes.com
florentinahomes@yahoo.com

Jehzlau Is Love.

2010-07-04T14:12:00.009+08:00

Why do I deserve an Android phone from Jehzlau?

Well...

1. He stepped on my precious foot during WordCamp 2008, and he didn't even say sorry. Lol. No, seriously, I ♡ Jehzlau-Concepts. :)

2. This is the ONLY way for me to own something high-end.

3. My phone really sucks. It's the cheapest qwerty phone I can afford. It looks good physically, but everything inside is blah! 4. As a frustrated blogger, I want to experience blogging through phone.

5. I've never won in any contest in my life and I would die just to win this time.

6. I'd kill just to have this phone. (Violent much? Hehe.)

7. Because Dumaguete is so third world, I don't even think an Android phone exists in this place. Wouldn't it be amazing if I'd be the first one to have it here? *beautiful eyes*

8. Because if I win this Android phone, I promise to give my 3-month old phone to a phoneless person. I just want to return the blessing and do a good deed just like what Jehzlau is doing. :)

9. I feel like a loser my entire life and I would like to know how it feels like to be a winner.

10. Because the Android phone is just AMAZING and so is Jehzlau. And I believe I am too. Lol:)

Random 102.

2010-07-03T17:48:00.012+08:00

My family is so awesome, they decided to have an instant party last night. Well it all started when my grandpop wanted to eat lechon and I wanted to eat gambas and stuffed squid. Good thing my grandmom was up for it because she's the only one who knows how to cook. Preparations were made on that same friggin' day. So yeah, poooof! Instant feast, beybeh!

Lechon

When there's lechon, there's Dinuguan/Blood stew

Baked squid stuffed with mozzarella cheese and bacon, covered with sour cream

Gambas soaked in butter! *slurppp*

Chicken cordon bleu

Sashimi

Steamed lapu-lapu

Macaroni salad

Leche flan

Pavlova - the best!

Because It's Usually Not Like That.

2010-06-06T15:38:00.012+08:00

May 31, 2009. Different individuals with different personality, beliefs, and culture were brought together in the magical place of MoalBoal, Cebu. Dentistry student, future economist, registered nurse, rockstar-slash-stage actor, student nurse, music master, IT specialist-slash-model wannabe, and a call center agent.

Team Okra Warriors was born.

May 31, 2010. These eight individuals celebrated their 1st year anniversary as friends. Who would have thought that after a year, we would still enjoy each others company considering our differences and OFs (other friends, haha!).

Happy first year anniversary, Team Okra!

Looking forward for more years with you guys!

It's Complicated.

2010-04-15T03:11:00.001+08:00

This might not be the right time, but I don't really know when the perfect timing for this is. I know this is plain stupidity and that you're just making some things easier for me. This could be your way of returning the favor perhaps, but don't you think everything's been too much already? I should know my limitations for this, but with you around, it feels like as if there are no rules to follow.

You make it so easy.

You make me so careless.

Things are unclear right now, and according to some social networking site, "It's complicated". Well I've finally felt this feeling everyone's been trying to explain to me. You know the this-feels-good-but-this-is-going-nowhere feeling? Yeah, I guess this is it.

This is not going anywhere, and I bet you feel the same way too. So I suggest we make things clear by staying as friends. I know it's bleak, but this is what I want to remember -- the happy times.

Work It.

2010-03-26T14:39:00.005+08:00

Since it's summer, and I think I'm still on the no-class-no-allowance policy with my Mom, I thought of having some sideline raket to support myself. Though I've been working on oDesk but I'm saving up for a digital camera. I'm not hoping for a DSLR anymore because it's like shooting for the stars. A decent digicam will do. Hopeless people can't be choosers, you know.

Since it's election time, I thought of using my lay-outing techniques and some marketing strategies, and there's this local candidate who was nice enough to hire me for my expertise. I only had limited resources so I had to go an extra mile in looking for a cheap but de kalidad printing shop. You see, running for public office is not a joke, and not to mention, very costly! It's important to, at least, bring your costings down.

This friend of mine who works for a printing shop in Cebu City generously offered me an unbelievably low rate for the tarpaulins. So gaiz, for designs, prints, photography, or video production, please please please check out ARCHIVUS DESIGNS. They actually have two branches in Cebu City -- Nasipit, Talamban and Junquera street. You may contact ARCHIVUS DESIGNS at (032) 253-2615 or 412-9484. If you're up to mass and fast production, then they're the best people to go to. As their tag line says, they create things easier.

The Emoness In Me.

2010-03-22T00:07:00.004+08:00

Every time I feel the urge to write, it's either I feel too up, or too down. Just like now, I feel so shitty. I don't understand exactly, but all I know is that I feel there are a lot of things to cry about now. I've been carrying this heavy heart lately, and I just wish I have someone to cry on. I wish everything's just fine right now so that I could be happy -- WE could all be happy.

I know people change, but memories don't, right? We outgrow the things we were used to do and have. That's given, and I completely understand that. But I just think it's quite unfair that everything around me has changed and moved on, and leaving me just the way I am. Why can't I just move forward and live my life the way I should be living it?

You know the feeling when you want to do this and that because that's what you guys were used to do, but you can't because your fellas have other more important things to do anymore, and besides, it's not their thing anymore? It hurts like crap, you know, because you can't do the things you enjoy most with your friends anymore. But all you can do is just act as if you're not affected, but inside you, there's this knife stabbing every organ you have inside your human body.

I wish I have friends who are by my side right now.

So maybe no one's reaching out, or maybe someone is, but I just can't feel it. But prideorwhatsoever aside, I miss them. That's all.

Valentine's Day 2010.

2010-02-14T01:43:00.005+08:00

When love is not madness, it is not love.

Happy Valentine's day, everyone! I'm sick and stuck in my room since the 11th. Can't go out, can't drink anymore (boohoo!), and Doc's putting me on a diet. I hope I will survive this -- the diet, that is. Lulzzz. So anyway, I thought I should post an entry about love or something like it, since it is Valentine's day today, but nah, I changed my mind. Rather, I wanna write someone a letter and she'll be reading this next V-day - February 14, 2011, since that someone is missing this year's V-day.

Dear K,

By this time, you're probably getting ready for a dinner with maybe your family or your special someone. I'd like to choose the latter, 'cause that would be exciting, don't you think? Considering that you've never spent this special day with... ehem. You know what I mean. I'm guessing you'll be receiving some chocolates and a bunch of white roses later. White, because you always thought that they're simple and elegant than those of the red ones which, as you said, looks bloody. And perhaps, Ferrero Rocher for the chocolates? I know, I know. Your favorites are Twix and Butterfinger, but come on, it's Valentine's anyway.It's about time you receive some decent Valentine chocolates.

Today, I'd like to believe you've already lost some pounds so that you could wear the black kinky dress you saw from Kamiseta. I remember you gave that dress a someday-i'll-fucking-wear-you look, and I just think that today is the best time to wear it. And oh, by the way, wear that red high heels you got from Alberto. It'd look good with the black dress.

He's probably taking you to this new resto along the boulevard and you guys will be having some fine dining. Maybe some caviar and fois gras would just be awesome for tonight. And for desert, perhaps crema de tropicale? Gawd, I'm salivating right now. Then after he pays the bill (of course, that's given already -- HE pays), you guys would chill somewhere not too noisy and crowded. You know, just talk and enjoy each others company, then maybe take you home at around past midnight.

But knowing the simple girl that you are, that is not your kind of a Valentine's day. You'd probably just hang out with your friends and get boozed, because you never want to spend your V-day with some formality, right? I don't know what the hell is wrong with you, but it seems that it's just your way of the so-called defense mechanism. But blah, whatever. I hope you've grown up already by this time, and maybe realize that not everyone takes advantage of you. You're too paranoid. Lulzzz.

When you get to read this, don't forget to write me back and tell me how great your Valentine's 2011 was.

Lurve,
Yourself

Random 101.

2010-01-15T08:50:00.001+08:00

So yeah, I haven't been blogging lately and I don't even know why I'm blogging right now. I just felt the urge to blog so here I am, typing. Ok, that's random! Lulzzz!

Well actually, the real reason why I haven't been blogging is because I am already working online. Have you ever heard of oDesk? Jeez, I'm a slave of that site now. Though I'm not earning as much as what I was earning when I was still working in a call center, but what the hell. I am earning my own money. Period.

Hooray for the chipped nail polish!

Few days ago, I received my Payoneer Debit Card. It looks kewl in shiny black. I already activated my card but I haven't tried using it yet 'cause I want my first cash out to be something memorable. Hahaha. I mean, when I cash out, I want to do something nice with the money like maybe buy something or use the money to go somewhere. You know me, I just want my firsts to be memorable.

I've been saving up for that Samsung Corby Txt B3210 phone. It looks cute and I've always wanted a qwerty phone ever since that Nokia communicator I was using died on me. I haven't had a Samsung phone because I'm a Nokia person, but let's face it, I can't afford an E63 or E71 right now, so I forced my heart to love Corby Txt. Lulzzz! But srsly, I want to try Samsung this time. The only thing I don't like about Corby Txt is that it's not WiFi ready. But I can deal with that since it can still browse the net anyway. And I have a laptop, which is by the way acting up on me right now, and a stable internet connection here at home so it's all good.

Ain't that a candy!

Keeping Up The Tradition.

2009-12-30T13:01:00.002+08:00

Last year, during our Christmas Tradition event, it rained so hard that not all the kids were able to attend. We also had limited space because we had to do it inside the bodega. Thank God this year, it didn't rain! We asked all the kids in the hacienda to gather outside our house so our family could share some Christmas spirit with them.

The party poopers -- all smiles :)

Let the games begin!

We gave them loot bags full of candies and goodies, toys, and school materials.

Me, joining the fun :)

Party is over. :( Now they have to walk to their homes.

Priceless!

Mooon Cafe Dumaguete

2009-12-03T06:11:00.001+08:00

I've always been a big fan of Mooon Cafe. Everytime I go to Cebu, I make sure to drop by Mooon Cafe, Guadalupe or IT Park. Among my faves are Chicken Mozzarella Melt, Chimichangga, and of course, the oh-so Baby Back Ribs. So imagine me when I heard Mooon Cafe's going to open at the Al Fresco area of Robinson's Dumaguete.

Few days ago, they finally opened. My friends and I went to check out the place.

Chimichangga: Php 79.00

San Mig Light: Php 37.00

My verdict:
Food - 4.5 stars out of 5 : The food's great! What can I say? I'm born with Mexican taste buds. Lulzzz.

Price - 4 stars out of 5 : The prices are reasonable enough. Not as expensive as what I thought.

Ambiance - 4.5 stars out of 5 : We stayed at the non-aircon part since my friends were smoking. If I were to suggest, I'd like them to put some ceiling fans outside as well. But nonetheless, the ambiance is amazing. I felt like I wasn't in Dumaguete.

Service - 1 star out of 5 : The service sucks. A lot of beverages in their menu weren't available and when I asked them when it's going to be available, they said that they don't know. The waiters weren't that attentive. Worst, we waited for our food for almost an hour. Only to find out, they forgot to punch in our order in their system. WTF right?!

For me, no matter how great or nasty the food is, no matter how expensive or cheap the resto/cafe is, as long as it has good service, then I'd definitely be going back over and over again.

I guess it's the service that makes or breaks a resto.

Alive Alive Alive.

2009-12-02T13:04:00.000+08:00

Wow. I can't believe I didn't blog here for four long months. I was busy blogging at my other blogs and I totally forgot about this one. Lulzzz. Naaah, I'm just too lazy to blog. Period. :)

In Memory Of My Friendster Account.

2009-11-20T15:03:00.000+08:00

Just a few minutes ago, I decided to open my Friendster account, and to my surprise, a lot has changed! The UI, buttons, apps, etc. I honestly think it has become a low-class version of Facebook. Oooops, no offense meant, but come on. Everyone I know has moved to Facebook because they thought Friendster turned into a jologs pit.

Well the reason why I permanently moved to Facebook is because (1) I got horrified when our helper, out of the blue, added me as a friend in Friendster. I know there's nothing wrong with that but come on. I just don't feel comfortable having her as a 'friend'. (2) I got so annoyed with all those fancy-glittery graphic comments and those mp3-codes widgets. Cause you see, if you wanna leave a comment, then leave something you mean to say. Not for the sake of just leaving something on your friend's page! And (3), Spammers are everywhere! Even if you set your profile to private, they just couldn't stop sending you messages. Ugh those spammerrrsssss!

So yeah, that's the time I told myself to abandon my Friendster. I wanted to delete the entire account but just for memories' sake, I didn't. I've had that account since February of 2004. Lulzzzz!And by the way, the only reason why I opened my FS account today is because I left a 'shout out' saying that I'm already in Facebook and that people should add me there. Oooooops. I think that's a dumb move!

My 2009 Wishlist

2009-11-16T01:51:00.000+08:00

Since the Yuletide Season is fast approaching, I want to share my wishlist, just in case you can't decide what to get me for Christmas or my birthday [FYI: December 31].

Domain - preferrably a dotcom please!

Google Wave invite - Come on, who doesn't want one!?

Nikon DSLR D90 - I'd kill to have this monster.

iPod Classic 160G - Yes, I prefer this more than iTouch.

Trip to somewhere - Have a break, have a k*tkat. Lulzzz.

External hard disk - I'm sick and tired of burning my files!

Cellphone with qwerty keypad and WiFi ready - The Nokia 9500 Communicator I was using died on me few months ago. So yeah, I want a new one.

Meet a celebrity crush - Nyahaha. I just couldn't help it.

Get an online job - I need moolah to buy my wants up there. 'Nuff said.

So there. I really don't expect these things to come true, you know. But who knows? o.O

Because Change Is The Only Constant Thing In This World.

2009-08-31T01:23:00.000+08:00

Why CHANGE when everything seems so fine and dandy and perfect and swell? Why change when you could not ask for anything more? Why change when you’re so used to what you have? Why change when everyone else is still the same?

Because change is what makes us feel most alive.

I think I have lived a fair part of my almost-21 years with change, not because I strive for it but because it is inevitable, powerful and inescapable.

But change can also start with you, a conscious effort and an initiative.

I’ve made a few major changes in my life these past few days and few minor "adjustments". I know I’ll never be the same person. And I do regret doing most not because they’re bad and unjust but because I would not forgive myself if I allowed those instance to pass. My decisions are not products of hasty discernment, mind you. I have really weighed them and careful thought about all of them. I must admit they are not the best but they are without a doubt the most proper and most fitting and most righteous choices I think I have ever made, or so I thought.

Sadly, I think I have lost close relationships.

I wish tomorrow I wake up with no regrets.

IMPOSSIBLE.

Do you know what hurts the most? Letting go of people who have earned your trust and those you have learned to love only to realize almost too late that you don’t mean as much.

Way way dramatic. I must say, right now I don’t give a damn if I sound like some poor idiot who feels so sorry for herself and so self-pitying. Whatever you may infer from this entry, be my guest.

I just want to take this chance to take a step forward leaving behind things, thoughts and people who make me feel least ALIVE.

Open Letter.

2009-07-17T13:11:00.000+08:00

Remember the time I told you that it's going to be okay and that everything will turn out fine?

Well, I was lying.

Forgive me for, maybe, giving you false hints, but that was all I could do. I had to lie, if it meant comforting you and making you feel better. I've been where you are, and God, I know how painful it exactly felt. I know sweet words aren't really enough to at least ease the pain, but it really does help. A bit, though.

You asked me if you had a choice. I told you to either cling to that damn hope of you two getting back together, or just move on with your life and deal with the fact that it's just up to there. You smiled and it was obvious that you opted the first one I suggested. But honestly, you really don't have a choice but to let go. It's bleak, I know, but I guess you just have to deal with reality.

It's really foolish to keep hoping that there's another chance, cause we all know how clear it is that this is really where it's at. I know you are much more willing to take the risk and even if you'd have to take all the shots, I know you'd take them wholeheartedly. Because above all your shortcomings and all else, you want her back. Period.

But she wants time and space for herself. And you can't force that.

Because You Are.

2009-07-03T00:40:00.000+08:00

Why’d he have to be so unbreakable?

Sometimes you think he’s slowly letting you in on his life, his secrets, his thoughts, and even the seemingly most "senseless" things he has to say. But predictable he is, he’ll shut you off. Not the tackless, rude, sudden "let’s-not-talk-about-it-anymore type of ‘brush off’" but the polite, almost subtle, and humorous kind which makes it hard for you to be outraged and frustrated.

There is such a thing as personal space anyway. I dare not probe and poke and prod or whatever. So I respect people’s privacy. BUT arrrgghhhh… why can’t I just probe and poke and prod or whatever?

He’s like a rock.

A ROCK.

They’re common but innately unique. They’re solid but you know at one point, they’ll break into pieces. They’re so there, so magnificent, so visible but sometimes unreachable.

A PARADOX. Unfathomable.

He’s unbreakable.

And I’m just standing here. Wishing I were unbreakable too. Wishing most selfishly he’ll break down in the most human, most real, most unarming way possible. He’s human.

But perhaps, I’m not the one to make him realize that he can’t live like the world’s going to hurt him or break him into pieces. That’s his own lesson to learn. Where has he been anyway? The world’s out to get everyone. I want to be the one who’ll make him realize that yes, it’s a big bad world, but trying not to be a part of it isn’t helping. And maybe if he bled a little he’d realize that hurt and pain is part of who are, like the blood that runs through our veins. Goodness! Not making any sense am I?

But there. Mr. Unbreakable, I’m hoping that maybe someday if I’m not too tired of waiting, you’ll get back to me sans those walls of yours.

Magic.

2009-06-14T05:53:00.000+08:00

I'm extremely happy because I have no reason not to be.

I'm Still Alive.

2009-04-22T08:17:00.000+08:00

It's been a month since I last blogged and God, I honestly don't know where to start. Well, a lot has happened but the highlight is that I already have a job. As in real job - I work 8 hours per day, 40 hours per week, and I'm paid with real money. Lol. And because of this job, I wasn't able to attend the 85% of the whole Estrada reunion. I went to Ang Tay (venue of the reunion) right after my shift, 10pm, and the program already ended and all. Poor me. I only have 1 single picture with me on it. Haha:)

The Fantastic Four with Lolo Dad and cousins.

The Fantastic Four with Mom and cousins.

The Fantastic Four with My generation. My cousins.

And this is the only picture I'm in. Haha:) Lola Estela's line.

And because of work too, I wasn't able to see Miss Bindoy 2009 and I wasn't able to go up on stage to give the award (Online Choice Award). BTW, I made the Miss Bindoy 2009 official website.

And because of work too, I wasn't able to attend Baby Sean's baptism in Calatrava. I'm his Ninang. :)

And because of work too, I wasn't able to rest during the holy week because I had to work.

And because of work too, I wasn't able to spend much time with Manang Belle. At some point, I felt guilty for it because she was the one who "entertained" me when I was in Manila last September.

And because of work too, I wasn't able to spend time with Wing on her birthday celebration at Hayahay.

Work's been messing with all my plans but, oh well, this is how it is in the corporate world. I just have to deal with it. But I really had a hard time dealing with the fact that I had to cancel on the Bora trip (with Kuya A, Ate Liz, Wing, and cousins) this May 1-3 because of work!

Sorry, I Know.

2009-03-23T01:30:00.000+08:00

I haven't been blogging here lately since there's really nothing to blog about. Seriously. I attempted to "write" a couple of times but I ended up saving it as a draft because I don't know how to continue anymore. Funny as it may sound, but after typing a few words, I end up staring at the cursor.

And today, finally, after all the school work chorva, me and some friends went all the way to Forest Camp, Valencia to give ourselves a little treat of the so-called FUN. :-D

I will miss you, guys. :)

You Gotta Be.

2009-03-03T00:23:00.000+08:00

I miss writing real entries and updating this blog with what's happening with my life lately. I just miss writing as if no one gets to read it, but as what I've always stressed out, it will just defeat the purpose of this blog. So yeah, I have to share this with the people in the cyberworld.

And there I go again. :-(

I'm In Love.

2009-02-24T15:58:00.000+08:00

Yes, I'm in love with a Leica.

Balentyms.

2009-02-05T23:47:00.000+08:00

Did anyone say "Valentine's Day"? Oh shyeah, I guess I heard it right.

I was chatting with Liza a while ago and she asked me, "Kams, mag-unsa ka karong 14? Naa na ka date?" [Kams, what are you doing on the 14th? Do you already have a date?]. I was like WTF?! What's with the 14th pala? And then it hit me. Haha:-D Can you imagine that I honestly forgot that Heart's Day is already around the corner. What the h*ll.

So anyway, few weeks ago, my friends and I planned to go on a group date on the 14th. Dine out then, as usual, drown ourselves with alc*hol. My V-Day is usually like that. Go drunken-crazeh-babeh. The only difference every year is the people I'm with. And this time, I plan to spend that very special day with my very special friends. My Alpha Delta Kappa friends are planning to "celebrate" on the eve, February 13, and we'll welcome the V-Day with a big bang bonggang bonggang bongbong. Lol.

But if, just if, worse comes to worst and I end up being alone on the 13th and 14th, I already have "back-up" plans.

♥ SKIP THE V-DAY. Sleep on the 13th and wake up on the 15th.

♥ JUSTICE FOR THE LOVELESS! Go and rally outside the usual restaurants where couples would have their oh-so-sweet candlelit dinner to celebrate the V-Day.

♥ FIND A DATE. Go to Mount Ararat and maybe, just maybe, find the ultimate Valentino there.Who knows, right?

Ok, that's pathetic, I know. Hahaha. But hey, those suggestions would probably work. Don't you think? So to those who are alone and do not know what to do on that day, just pick your choice among the three of my "back-up" plans. Ok? Go.

Gone Down.

2009-02-02T16:13:00.000+08:00

Okay, YOU are freaking me out. Swear.

Sugar Rush.

2009-01-23T01:31:00.000+08:00

It's quite amazing how a dull picture can change a lot of things and feelings. Sadness could turn into happiness in a blink of an eye. Love could turn into loved in just a millisecond.

If you think it takes time, you might wanna think again. :-|

P.S. Whoever tried to search "Winsse Villanueva" using my search bar, sorry, but I don't know him/her.

Ohana.

2009-01-22T00:34:00.000+08:00

They call it Family...

...I call it Mine. :-)

McDo Commercial.

2009-01-13T01:00:00.000+08:00

I bet you guys saw this commercial already. This has been the talk-of-the-town and the talk-of-the-blogosphere as well. This McDo ad brought me back a lot of memories when I was younger. Nostalgic, grabe. Hmmmm. It's not just about the video, but the soundtrack as well. I've always been a fan of EHeads and using "Ang Huling El Bimbo" for this ad is really a perfect choice. The whole concept is really rocking, you know. :-P

At kahit hindi rin naging kami sa huli, siya pa rin ang first love ko.
Awww! That is so sweet! First love will always be the first love.
Everyone can relate to this, right?

McDo commercials are the bombs! This one, particularly, made me kilig.

And oh, who could ever forget Lolo, Karen, and Gina [whoever she is]? :-D

Like Yeah, Roots.

2009-01-12T04:16:00.000+08:00

Calling all ESTRADAs originally from Basilan, Zamboanga, Manila and wherever. FYI, we're having a reunion on April (holy week) here at Dumaguete City. This may sound funny but I just overheard my Lolo, Lola, and Titas talking about this the other day when some relatives came over to visit from Manila and Zamboanga. Haha. Well honestly, I'm kinda excited about this reunion since, I guess, this will be the first time for everyone to get together, and I think it's really sweet because it will be held here in Dumaguete, and everyone is flying over. This is going to be fun! :-D

Calling all VILLANUEVAs from around the world, were having a reunion on May 2009. Don't know the exact date, because I never seem to care about this reunion. The last time I attended a reunion of this side of the family, sorry, but I got bored. No offense meant. Some people chose who to mingle with, and I believe that is not what a reunion is all about, right? I think this is the problem if you have a really big big big family. But nonetheless, I am hoping for a better reunion this year. But oh well, who am I to complain? Tss.

Both sides of the family are having a reunion this summer - April and May.

Why is everybody coming up with a reunion? Hmmmm. Please don't tell me it's the end of the world. :-|

Now Pose.

2009-01-11T00:42:00.000+08:00

I had a dream...

...and I know it will just remain a dream. :-(

Silverlining.

2009-01-07T00:10:00.000+08:00

J asked me through Y!M, "Describe your 2008 in one word".

Well, first of all, we're always like that. We ask each other these slum-bookish questions, and more often than not, we end up laughing our asses off and making funny (and not to mention, weird) faces on our web cams. We also compare our answers and try to criticize each other's point of view. It's fun, but it is indeed stupid, at some point.

2008, as I said, was a great year for me, generally. A lot has happened and I just couldn't simply describe the 12 months in one single word, but I honestly tried to squeeze in everything in a one-word-capsule. I tried to use the word HAPPY, but I think it's an understatement. Hmmmm. BLESSED. There. I got the right word to describe my 2008 -- BLESSED.

Don't ask why anymore. =)

Far Away.

2009-01-05T23:24:00.000+08:00

I wish I had more time. =(

TYs.

2009-01-02T18:48:00.000+08:00

Mommy. Lolo Dad. Lols. Manong Popoy. Kyle. Ate Kim. Tita Yeen. Uncle Vinnie. Lolo Uncle. Auntie Weena. Auntie Mila. Lola-Lola. Tita O. Nikka. Papa.

Tita Wing. Piwiw. Timon. Choi. Mar. Pusoy. Bison. Bobbyrich. Marky.

Rizza Mae. Manil. Jhoey. Mak. Jude. Koya. Porpor. Doms. Vince. Manang. Piggy Bank. Smith.

Yana. En. Gail. Bam. Drei. Chino. Jupo. RJ. Chedette. Lher. Derick.

Sir Arpee. Yuimien. Beneno. Goma. gelloXP.

Lloyd. Allen. Jude. Wing. Ate Liza. Ate Beauty. David. Panda. Wynne. Chres. Daryl. Meliza. Desiree. Hanzel. Nixx. Ricky. Elaine. Jerome. Genesis. Dee-Jay. Rose. Sinclaire. Louie.

Jai. Giowoah. Mrs. Limjoco. Jake. Mara. Klara. JM. Winsse. Isabella. Erika.

Thank you for making my birthday extra special!

...and this will be updated...

Survivor.

2009-01-02T17:28:00.000+08:00

Looking back on my 2008, I couldn't help but give myself a tap. I couldn't imagine anymore how I survived the 365 days of 2008. I had my ups and downs, and it was super chaotic, sure thing. But here I am, still whole, alive, and kicking.

I couldn't point out anymore the important things that happened last year, but I can surely point out the things that made me happy - the times when I felt that I was in the highest point of my life. I could clearly remember that those were the months of the last quarter of the year, and honestly, I still haven't gotten over with those things. I don't know if this is good or bad, but there are a lot of feelings and actions that I brought to 2009 which, I know, should be left behind.

But yeah, here I am now, as I said, whole, alive, and kicking.

Generally, 2008 was a great year for me.

I just don't know what to expect this 2009, because I am very much aware that I didn't start my year right. Thankstoyou.

Happy Birthday.

2008-12-31T21:45:00.000+08:00

"How old na ka today?"
"Seventeen."
"Hmmm. How long have you been seventeen?"
"For a while."

Hahahah! Ulol ka. :D

Christmas Tradition 2008.

2008-12-29T00:32:00.001+08:00

It's the time of the year when our family continues the tradition we've been doing since my mom and her sisters were still kids. I also blogged about last year's tradition event HERE. So yeah, just read it up. :)

This year, it rained so hard, thus we had to do the activity inside the old office (which is now a bodega). We were afraid that the kids won't show up because of the non-stop rain that day, but thank God, they did! We didn't do the usual games (sack race, tag-o-war, trip to jerusalem) anymore due to the lack of space, but we replaced them with "hep-hep hooray!", singing contest, etc. We were used to have the whole event in the grounds and we didn't anticipate the rain. Though we were making siksikan inside the old office, it was still helluva FUN!

The kids

This year is also special because our friends joined us!

The loot bags

Hep hep hooray!

The kids having so much fun!

Fujiko, the cutest kid who attended the event :)

See you all again next year, kids!
Have a merry christmas! ♥

Countdown.

2008-12-21T02:08:00.000+08:00

Four days from now, it's going to be Christmas Day and since Christmas is all about love, forgiveness, and giving, I just made friends with the person who used to be my barkada-turned-mortal-enemy. I hope I'm making some sense here, but yeah, I already set aside whatever pride I had just to finally put an end to whatever issues we had. I'm trying to make everything right this Christmas season. I'm taking the baby steps this time. Slowly but surely.

I know I can do this one by one. There's actually no need to rush, but I realized that I'm running out of time. It might be just too late for me to patch things up between whoever. I couldn't take it anymore if ever the situation will get worse.

I said sorry, but I didn't think any explanations were necessary. Yes, I waved the white flag already. That doesn't mean that we could be friends again, but it doesn't mean we're still enemies, right? Neither friends, nor enemies. I just don't know what to call this, but I like it better this way.

So I just started with Ching. Who's next?

Another Open Letter.

2008-12-08T23:53:00.000+08:00

Dear ****,

Hi. Hello. I know you're not expecting this. I chose this most difficult and hi-tech medium in writing this open letter just because I know you'll never get to read this. Never.

There are a lot of things I want to let you know, really. But something deep inside me is telling me that I shouldn't take the risk of speaking out for myself because things will only get worse. I've seen scenes just like this, and I tell you, it didn't do any good. I could honestly say that I've learned from my experiences already and it just sucks knowing that here I am again, back to the starting line, and wishing I could just make a short cut to the finish line. But sometimes, I just think I'm running on an infinite open track. It has always been like this. Always.

It isn't at all time that I will be tolerating this and just let each day pass without you realizing that I could get tired with this and that it is now your turn to move and do the impossible - to, at least, make an effort. We know I already took my chances, and now, it's your time to show me what you got. It's going to be now or never, you know.

When I get to read this again one day, I wish I could just extend a smile on my face and hopefully remember this moment. A moment where I could tell myself that at least, I tried. And on that day, I'd never wonder what this whole thing could have been, because I could swear that I made my fair share to keep the bond. I fought for this.

If maybe, just maybe, you'll stumble upon this letter one day, all I could wish for is that you would tell yourself that you were such an idiot for taking things for granted, and that you lost without even fighting for it.

We'll talk soon, okay? :-(

Spur.

2008-12-05T17:53:00.000+08:00

I feel terrible today. I have dysmenorrhea and the pain made me skip my classes for the day. But what made me feel more terrible is that no one would believe how severe this whole thing felt. Well, on second thoughts, maybe it's because I expected too much from my own tree.

Broken na gani, wala pa gyuy trust. That's why this tree will remain broken forever.

You're It.

2008-12-02T22:18:00.000+08:00

I was asked, "What childhood game you like the most?".

When I was a kid, I remember my Mom would often tell me that running, biking outside the house, playing with soil, and things alike, are NO-NOs. I just felt so deprived, while every child in the neighborhood is having the time of his/her life dancing under the rain. I sure had a bike, like every kid had, but I felt so pathetic because I'm not allowed to go biking outside the house. My only track and field was our sala.

The time I started playing lupa-langit and tayokok was when I started my elementary. But later, I just gave up on those games because I wasn't so good at it. It came to a point that I just realized that maybe it wasn't really my thing. And besides, I wasn't able to practice when I was younger. I had no experience in playing those kind of games. Let's put it this way, my classmates were already "professionals" while I was still a "beginner".

But there's this game that's really close to my heart. God, I couldn't remember the last time I played hide and seek or tagu-an anymore. I know I'm too old for that game, but if I were given a chance, I'd give up anything just to hear someone say to me, "Hey, I found you", again. :-(

To Wait Is A Virtue.

2008-12-01T04:36:00.000+08:00

Correct me if I'm wrong, but most of us spend all our lives waiting, right? Waiting for the right moment to express our feelings. Waiting for the perfect time to confront. Waiting for signs. Waiting for someone to come. Waiting to be asked. Waiting for the right moment to break a news to someone. Waiting for something. And sometimes, we even wait for just nothing.

No matter how hard we try, more often than not, the only option we've got is just to wait. But that's how life gets exciting. We wait, not knowing what the whole thing would take, not knowing for how long, and not knowing whether the backwash would be inclinely favored to us. We just wait, because we let fate surprise us. But come to think of it, it's really stupid to wait for something, and you know in the first place that it will never come, right? :-(

Again.

2008-11-29T03:56:00.000+08:00

OMFG. This is sooooo gah. Someone searched for this blog again, but this time, he/she entered "kamille villanueva's blog". Hey, is this domain too hard to remember that you have to search it again today? It's www.kvillanueva.com, that short and simple. Pft. But it's all cool, you know. I just can't get over with the fact that some people would really go out of their way just to know my blog. This is just weird.

I wonder who could this person be? Hmmmmmm. Thinking. :-)

Unusual.

2008-11-28T04:35:00.000+08:00

According to my stats, someone googled me up and entered the keywords "blog kamille villanueva" which led him/her to this site. Whoa. That kinda amazes me because who in the world will google me up?! Too bad I can't track the IP address because I really wanna know who that mysterious person is. Blah. It's just that I just wanna know who googled this blog up. That's all. :-)

So anyway, I have to wake up early because I have to be at school before 8:30AM. I am tasked to be there before the Basketball (W) starts. I don't even know why I'm kissing these people's ass when in fact, there are SOME people who are living their luxurious lives only because they are exempted on this whole damn Intrams thing without even having to pay the fines. You know sometimes, I just don't get how the whole system of school governance works. No offense meant.

But on the lighter side, even though I have to get up so early later, I'm still a bit excited on what's going to happen later. Hopefully, it's going to be a great day.

So as I end this post, let me share with you a picture of me and my lovable cousin, Justin, who's now back in Manila. I kinda miss him right now.

Onwards.

2008-11-23T03:35:00.000+08:00

I haven't updated for a while, and that's because I became so busy with school, or if not, I have been sleeping. Lol. I kinda love to spend my "vacant" time sleeping. Oh I don't know why I so love to sleep. I can hibernate for like forever, you know.

So anyway, this coming week will be very stressful. Well, not about school though. This coming Tuesday, November 25, will be our city's fiesta. I'm not quite sure if we will be celebrating here at home. I still have to confirm that with my Grandmother tomorrow. Hehe. Then on Wednesday, November 26, while everyone is still having a hang-over from their drinking spree the night before, I have to go to school because it's going to be our Intramurals, and I still have to check on what event I am assigned. That is if the chairperson didn't forget to include me in the Food Committee. Hay. She seems to be so clueless about everything. I have been a member of the Food Comm for 3 years now, and I am sure that she's not worth of the position. Being the chairperson, and she doesn't even know how everything works in the committee? That's just so pft.

So back to November 26, Charm will be arriving on that day as well so I better know how to balance everything so I could spend time with her too.

November 27, still, I have to go to school because the event that I might be assigned to might have a game on that day. Gah. I really don't know. I prolly won't be meeting up with Charm on that day since she's going to attend a wedding. Maybe after though.

November 28 onwards, most probably, I will be going to school again for the Intrams until the closing ceremonies that I don't even know when exactly.

November 29, Panda Bear and friends will arrive and I have to take her and her friends out. They will be here for just a day, and they're going back to Cebu the following day, so we have to make the most out of whatever time we have.

Then December 1 is holiday, so classes are resuming on December 2.

Wah. See, I told you next week will be stressful, but in a good way though. So that's my schedule next week. You can stalk me if you want! Just be harmless. Lol. =)

We Always Wake Up.

2008-11-14T23:41:00.000+08:00

I just exported all my entries from my http://kaakaams.co.nr site to http://kvillanueva.com. I'm not quite sure if I did the right thing, since I wanted to start all over again. But on second thought, I couldn't just leave my posts there until they rot. So yeah, I imported all my entries here and filed them under "Uncategorized" just so readers won't get confused.

I haven't started linking up my blogger friends just yet. As what I love to do whenever I start a new blog, I'd rather feel the loneliness of my new blog first. There's this "satisfying" feeling I feel when I know that I'm the only one who's reading all these thing written here, and that I'm the only one who knows that I actually have a [dot]com. Hehe. Oh, by the way, I was thinking of getting my food blog a [dot]com too. But first of all, I really think I should get my own camera soon. Don't you think?:-D

So anyway, I don't know if they'll get to read this, but I'm super grateful to Ate Ria and Winston for taking a bit of their time just to give me advises on how to start putting up a Bloggers Society here in Dumaguete City. Sure thing, you've probably heard of MindanaoBloggersSociety or the CebuBloggersSociety - two of the most successful bloggers organization here in the country, and both Ate Ria and Winston are part of MBS core group, by the way. They were the organizers of WordCamp 2008, which I attended in Manila last September.

I am very excited for this community of Dumaguete Bloggers to come to realization, because I know that in this way, we could share our knowledge in blogging to others by holding events and workshops. And also, in this way, we could also help promote, not only tourism in Dumaguete, but Dumaguete City as a whole. It's great to know a bunch of amazing people who shares the same interest with you. :-p I'm really crossing my fingers on this one.

Go For The Goal.

2008-11-12T17:05:00.000+08:00

Calling all DUMAGUETEÑO/DUMAGUETEÑA or
DUMAGUETE-BASED Bloggers

Anyone interested in helping me put up a Bloggers Society for us?
All I need as of the moment is a core group.
We could talk about this over coffee, or dinner perhaps?

For further questions, you may leave me a comment, or e-mail me at kaakaams@gmail.com.

Ocho-ocho.

2008-11-12T00:45:00.000+08:00

I got tagged by Ricky, and so I am tasked to write down 8 things about me. I think I already did this before but I'm going to do it again because Ricky is my friend. Hehe. But to spice up this tag thing a bit, I'm going to share "8 WEIRD THINGS YOU PROBABLY DON'T KNOW ABOUT ME".

★ I have different names on my birth and baptismal certificates. Don't ask me why.

★ I had three secret blogs before this one, but they're all dead now. Pft. I've been a blogger for four years now, and I currently have 5 active blogs.

★ Proven and tested, I can stay awake for four days straight. Beat that!

★ Contrary to #3, I also love to sleep. I could sleep for 17 hours straight.

★ I am a lactose-intolerant person. So now you know what happens to me when you let me drink too much milk!

★ I have 3 phone lines. Globe, Smart, and Sun. If you're in our family, having at least 2 phone lines is normal.

★ My great-grandmother from my Mom's paternal side is American. And my great-great-grandfather is Spanish. Neither of their heirs have blue eyes or the mestiza/mestizo looks. Unlucky me!

★ I eat my bread with peanut butter AND cheeswhiz. They have to go together because I don't like the taste of peanut butter alone.

And the tag rules to follow are:

Each player starts with eight random fact/habits about themselves.

People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.

At the end of your blog post, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their name.

Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged and to read your blog.

Happy Tagging!

But I kinda want to break some rules here.
I'm tagging everyone who gets to read this thing!

Take Me Down.

2008-11-10T03:22:00.000+08:00

Okay, so I take back what I said. I will not be deleting this blog anymore. You see, it was just a spur-of-the-moment thing and it's really normal for someone like me who happens to experience a lot of spur-of-the-moments. Am I even making sense here? Gah. =)

Havta blog later. I'm preparing for something. And it's a SURPRISE.

Wish I Could Fall.

2008-11-03T02:41:00.000+08:00

This is so pointless. There should be a better way than this.

This And That.

2008-10-26T15:59:00.000+08:00

One step at a time. There's no need to rush. I can fix this. ='(

Getaway With It.

2008-10-22T16:47:00.000+08:00

The following are mixed up pictures from our Siquijor and Bacolod trip. I couldn't upload all because I'm so lazy to put watermarks, so I just chose a few of our pictures. Hehe. So this is what my Sembreak is all about. Well, as of the moment though. =) Try guessing what pictures are from Bacolod and what are from Siquijor. Game? Game!

I Feel Like I'm Dying.

2008-10-18T17:16:00.000+08:00

I'm sorry I didn't mean to call but I couldn't fight it. I guess I was weak and couldn't even hide it, and so I surrender just to hear your voice. I know how many times I said I'm gonna to live with out you and maybe someone else is standing there beside you, but there's something baby that you need to know. That deep inside me I feel like I'm dying. I have to see you it's all that I'm asking. Vida, give me back my fantasies. The courage that I need to live. The air that I breathe. Cariño mio, my world becomes so empty. My day's are so cold and lonely. Each night I taste the purest of pain. I wish I could tell you I'm feeling better every day. That it didn't hurt me when you walked away, but to tell you the truth I can't find my way. And deep inside me I feel like I'm dying. I have to see you it's all that I'm asking. ='(

It's a friggin' song I liked way way way before. I came across it a couple of days ago and it brought back memories. You know what I mean. Download it, if you never heard it before. It's "Purest of Pain" by Son By Four.

By the way, if you have noticed I have a new header. Howdya like it?

It Could Be Mine Too.

2008-10-10T01:50:00.000+08:00

The Dream Date.

She knocked on his bedroom door and no one answered. It was already half past nine when she got to his almost empty house, the notes on the fridge reminding her that the folks were out for the weekend. Slowly pushing the door open, she was welcomed by a hanging cardboard with an arrow hastily painted on it. It was pointing towards the ceiling but when she lifter her head, there was nothing there, except for the brown marks drawn by the leak on the roof.

She looked around, trying to find any traces of him and there was none. It started to worry her, after realizing that it was beyond unusual for him to message “i need u 2nyt. pls drop by the haus asap… i mean, f u can. tnx!”, especially on a Friday, when he’s supposed to be out getting wasted with friends.

And then she heard a familiar sound- the strumming of a guitar, and it dawned on her that it was coming from the rooftop.

“Is he being emo again?”, asked her, while rolling her eyes. She has gotten used to his bouts of self-pity and depression, where he’d sulk in the corner of his room and do a CSI or Scrubs or House marathon. But this time, it’s different because he actually went on the roof and played the guitar. He was only 14 when he attempted to learn the instrument.

The rooftop was an unchartered territory for her. After thinking long and hard of ways to get on the roof, she finally decided to let it go and take the fire exit ladder, which she never even knew existed. And on her last step, she looked up and saw what would be her “true-love snapshot”, according to Mitch Albom.

He was seated on a plaid mat, hopelessly and tragically playing his guitar and wearing his favorite already faded “I SURVIVED SAGADA” shirt. The 2 lit candles, she recognized, were from the altar in the living room. He prepared chips, a thermos of hot chocolate and bought a box of cake. She loves cake.

Barefoot, she walked up to him and gave out a hearty laugh.

“Stop laughing at me!”, he said with that half-pout, half-smile expression that just drives her nuts.

“I’m not laughing at you, I’m just… laughing. Period. Is it a crime to laugh now?”

“Hey, you gotta admit. You didn’t expect this.”

She smiled, nodded and sat beside him.

“What’s the event? It’s not our anniversary, not our monthsary, not my birthday, not your birthday.”

“Well, nothing, really. I just thought I’d be cheesy and Dawson-ish for a night.”

“Dawson-ish. I like that. But you were never the sensitive Dawson, Mr. Pacey-Wacey, and let us not even go there.”

He laughed for a bit and then got quiet.

“Do you really want to know what and why?”, he said, looking down on his feet. “Three years ago tonight, something happened.”

She quickly tried to recall any monumental thing that might have occurred on February 27 three years prior but she was caught at a dead end.

“What?”

“You happened.”

Her heart tightened as he said that and she fought any urge to cry. They were never an emotional couple. No dramas, none of those scenes that make-up those melancholic Korean movies. She felt like she was being locked in that time, in that minute and everything was but surreal.

“I was on this rooftop, smoking, the night after I submitted my final thesis papers. And just out of nowhere, like a light bulb moment, it dawned on me that I wanted you. I wanted to be with you. After all that you’ve done, I just thought you deserve to hear it from my lips.”

He was looking straight ahead, as if lost in his own words while she inched her way to his side and rested her head on his shoulder. A few more minutes of crickets, breeze and silence, he felt the wetness on his shirt brought about by the streaming tears from her eyes.

“Hey, baby! C’mon, let’s drink the choco before it gets cold. Also, they ran out of Dunhill Frost so I just got you Morris instead.” and just like that, he snapped both of them out of that WB teen series moment.

“You do know I’ve upgraded, right? I don’t smoke Philip Morris anymore.”

“Okay, fine. I got reds. You want reds? Yes? No? I thought so…”

Their lovely night was spent munching on junk food, drinking Ovaltine, smoking cigarettes, playing cards, singing random 90’s pop songs and talking about life in general. Occassionally, they would cuddle, wrapped up in a blanket and in their PJ’s, watch the stars in their glory.

“Thank you, God.”, she whispered under her breath. “I’ll never trade this for anything.”

And with his arms around her body and her head on his chest, they both closed their eyes and drifted away to the music playing on his iPod. “I’ll stop the world and melt with you…”, sang Jason Mraz.

Kring's dream date. It could be mine too. =)

Just Fine.

2008-10-06T02:14:00.000+08:00

It's 2:24 in the morning, and as usual, I can't sleep. I need to get up early tomorrow because I have to go to school early. As if. Bahala na.

I haven't started posting "food posts" on my new hosted blog yet, that's why I'm not yet sharing the link. Lol. The FTPs and the plugins are already up, and all I f*cking need is a camera! Or else, I won't be able to start running my new site. Pft.

What the hell is wrong with me?

Plurkera.

2008-10-03T00:20:00.000+08:00

I'm very happy and proud to share with you this. In case you haven't noticed, I belong to Plurk's Top 10 plurkers with the most number of fans in the whole Philippines. Imagine that! Lol. I ranked 9th yesterday, but I dropped in the 10th place today. But I still think it's weird having "fans", you know.

If you've been plurking, please add me up HERE.
If not, what the hell are you waiting for! Start plurking now! Lol.

FYI: Plurk is a relatively new service that is very similar to twitter. You have 140 characters to explain to people what you are doing, you can copy and paste video/img links, and you can also have “fans” (followers on twitter) that can stalk you…I mean follow your updates. Plurk does have a few things that twitter doesn’t such as Karma points and a “friend” status. Karma points are awarded based on your network activity, this means your and your friend’s activity on Plurk. The more you and your friends use Plurk, the more karma points you get. Karma points then give you access to little emotion icons that are found in popular chat programs such as aim. --- Source

Skimberlee, Skimberloo.

2008-10-02T04:31:00.000+08:00

Hei, I changed my mind about the site that was given to me. I'm not going to make it a personal blog anymore because I just realized that I have a Tumblr blog, 2 Wordpress blogs, 3 Blogspot blogs, and accounts on Twitter and Plurk, where I do microblogging. I barely even have time to update my personal blogs because sometimes, I just run out of things to write, and that's because I am very careful with what I write now. I know of personal friends [and even family] who read my blogs and I just don't feel so comfortable about it. That's why I'm extra cautious.

So anyway, I decided to make my new hosted blog a different one from all of my other blogs. After brain-storming on what category I should focus on, I've finally decided to settle with something that I really love, and that would be nothing less than... [*drum roll please*] FOOD -- in big bold letters. Now you can laugh out loud.

Seriously, I wanted to have a techie blog, but that's a total boohoo. How can I write about something I don't even have. As they say, practice what you preach. So that lead me to the idea of running a food blog, because Dude, [*don't dare laugh*] there's nothing better I know than the super good and the not-so good food around. Now you can laugh again.

Ugh. Whatever this whole thing would take, I'm still super over-whelmed that someone offered me free hosting. I mean, it's not everyone in this blogosphere would be offered something like this. Some people just feels good when they give something in return. Kevin is simply sparing about 30USD for good hosting of my soon-to-be FOOD BLOG, you know.

And by the way, that reminds me, I really ~~want~~ need a camera!

To Or Not To.

2008-10-01T13:47:00.000+08:00

Finally! After blogging for four years now, I finally got hosted by Kevin of Pinoy Teens! Super thank you Kevs, I never thought getting hosted can be that easy. LOL. So anyway, I'm still thinking if I should leave this blog and move to my other new home. =)

I'll keep you posted, guys!

Another Open Letter.

2008-09-30T01:24:00.000+08:00

ADKS & Fatties,

I really don't like to care anymore because I'm hurting already. I tried so hard to keep the bond, but as I held on, I realized that the tighter my grip was, the more I was pushed away.

I felt isolated.

I don't want to try harder anymore because it would only make me feel bad about myself. Sobra na. TH na kaayo ko to save this. I've even went out of my way to at least save this effing friendship, pero wala. I only got nothing in return.

I don't care if you'll read this. After all, I'm not saving any friendship anymore.

Just When.

2008-09-25T01:21:00.000+08:00

I don't know if I should feel bad. I called up a friend whom I was suppose to meet tonight. It turned out that this certain friend of mine was already sleeping. She answered the call with her I-was-sleeping-until-you-called voice and told me that we'll meet tomorrow instead. I was fine about it because it's all cool.

After the conversation has ended, she forgot to press the red button and I heard something that wasn't meant for me to hear. ='(

I can't believe my friend has been hiding something from me all this time.

Another Friend Who Blogs.

2008-09-22T16:08:00.000+08:00

Nethaneel "Neel" Sagun -- a fellow member of the Alpha Delta Kappa Society, partner in crime during Accounting and Stat classes last semester, a friend to all -- now blogs.

Welcome to the Blogosphere, Neel!

Left.

2008-09-21T23:32:00.000+08:00

There's this feeling that just pops out of your system and even yourself couldn't understand how it feels exactly. So here I am right now, making a face-to-face connection with my laptop, staring at the screen, typing as if I know exactly where this post would lead, because I just feel like blogging. I know I haven't been really updating with what's really happening with my life lately, but nah, who cares? I just miss this. Whatever this is.

Recent acts have been topsy-turvy, and I don't know how to end this. I don't even know how this started. I don't know how to fix this. Can I even still clean up this mess? Sometimes, I hope that I could just hold down the keys Ctrl + Alt + Del. But in reality, blaming or pinpointing is the easiest escape. Family, peer pressure, school, social life, friends, classmates, and sometimes, even God. But at the end of the day, it boils down to one thing: Why did I let this happen?

I wish I could write more about this, but I ~~don't want to~~ can't.

After all, it's always going to be me, right?

Whatevs.

2008-09-17T02:15:00.000+08:00

More often than not, I'm left with no choice.

Attempt.

2008-09-15T12:48:00.000+08:00

I want to be a photographer.
But first, I need a camera.

* Picture taken at Bo's Coffee Club, Glorietta last September 8, 2008.

Sabado Night.

2008-09-14T00:42:00.000+08:00

Guess what? I'm here at home on a Saturday night. I don't know if it's a good thing or not because this is so unusual and so-not-me thing. Well I think this is because I still feel so beaten-up after last night. The beer-then-rhumcoke drinking spree wasn't so good for me after all!

Let me start from the "good part" of last night's happening. Wing and I went to Hayahay at around 12 in the morning. After two bottles of beer, a platter of mixed sushi and Dumaguete express, we followed Ate Liz, Kuya Aldon, and their Manila-based friend, Romel at El Camino, some sort of a pub near Hayahay.

It was my first time to literally "party" at El Camino. Usually, I'm only seen there because of a school function (like acquaintance parties etc.), or maybe because a friend dragged me there. And at those times, I'm often at the corner, drinking. I never dance nor socialize with the people at the dance floor.

I was in a bar in Makati last weekend, Club Bureau, where I was able to dance elbow-to-elbow with Anne Curtis, Tim Yap, and all other Manila's elite, who all happened to be in the bar as well. The crowd there was fantastic! It was only last night that I realized that the crowd in Club Bureau is just like 5 steps better than the party people in El Camino. For me, both crowds couldn't be leveled of course, but at least, the crowd in El Camino isn't as worst as I thought. In fairness, the attitude was impressive.

Late-night-foodtrip-after-partying is an SOP. It was about 5AM already when we left El Camino to satisfy our hunger. We went to Qiosko, and we had Arozz Balao. It's a must-try, I tell you!

Ate Liz, Kuya Aldon, and Wing dropped me here at home just right before the sun showed up.

P.S. I heard Mark Mejia is currently preparing himself for next year's American Idol. OMG. =)
P.P.S. If you don't happen to know who Mark Mejia is, he was the one who beat David Archuleta on StarSearch five years ago.
P.P.P.S. He's a Filipino. =)

Peace Men.

2008-09-11T00:43:00.000+08:00

So I take back what I said in my previous post. I realized that I shouldn't be too affected with some people's perception about my blog, because after all, it's MY blog. I write what I feel, and what I feel like writing. My grammar may not be as perfect as their's but at least, I could swear that I write from the heart.

The previous post was some sort of a spur-of-the-moment reaction, you see. It's just that I really feel like moving, but I just can't leave this one. I can't decide what to do exactly! I want to publish my OWN site. Have my own domain, and everything. But blah! Whatever.

My trip was super fine. I really had fun, I swear to God! I learned a lot, and it's just so amazing that I rode a taxi alone, from the condo to La Salle, then from the condo to Glorietta too! See, I told you guys I can learn. Haha. =)

The convention went well, because the organizers were super amazing! And not to mention, the sponsors and the speakers too! Thank you, not just because I learned a lot from the lectures, but because I really think it's more than that. I got acquainted with some other bloggers from where ever. It's the experience and exposure, you know. =)

I'm planning to get my own domain and webspace. Kaakaams [dot] com perhaps? Wadyu think? Can anyone please help me with this?

FU.

2008-09-09T15:39:00.000+08:00

I am finally taking this blog down because I've had enough!

Hello.

2008-09-05T01:11:00.000+08:00

A few hours from now, at 5AM, Ate Kim and Niño, together with some friends, will be going to Cebu to attend a friend's wedding. Then at 9AM, Jude will be boarding Cebu Pacific bound for Manila for his scheduled interview at the US Embassy on the 9th. Then at 5PM, I will follow, boarding Philippine Airlines, bound for Manila of course, for my convention on Saturday.

And guess what, I haven't packed my stuff yet. Not even a single undie. Pft.

It Is Simply Amazing.

2008-09-04T01:39:00.000+08:00

Here's something for the people who thought that a love story like this only happens in an oh-so-perfect-love-story movie.

If you think fairy tales do not exist these days, think again. It made me. =)

Off To Nevernever Land.

2008-09-02T00:12:00.000+08:00

I know some of you are wondering where I am going on the 6th, especially Ricky. Hi Rick! Haha. So I've decided to just give the information away because first, I'm beginning to think that it's just me who's making this whole thing a big deal when it's supposed to be not. Second, you guys will find out sooner or later and there's no point in hiding this anyway. Third, because I am very proud and I want the whole world to know that I am participating in this convention -- The WORDCAMP PHILIPPINES 2008.

I am very honored to be a part of this first-time event on September 6, 2008 at De La Salle - College of Saint Benilde, Manila, which will be attended by 250 chosen Wordpress bloggers and blog enthusiasts all over the Philippines. This is a big event and this is also the first WordCamp in Southeast Asia, FYI. There are a lot of activities and lectures that are scheduled on the convention day itself, and I am super duper excited about this.

I joined because I want to learn and widen my knowledge on these things. I've been a blogger for 4 years now, and I think it's now time for me to undergo some formal lectures and talks about this, and it's really my privilege to be chosen among thousands (I suppose) of applicants. To be qualified to join and be a part of this premier event for bloggers and developers like me is really an honor, because not to mention, this event will be attended by Matt Mullenweg himself, and I'm going to have the effing chance to meet him live in person. OMG.

I will be leaving on the 5th, then I will be back on the 9th. After the main event, I still have a few days before I come home, so maybe Jude and I will hopefully have the chance to go around Manila. Hi Jude! Lol!

Stalk me if you want! LMAO.

There She Goes Again.

2008-08-29T00:51:00.000+08:00

The celebration is finally over.

Let this post be a personal rant, because I still can't get over with two things!

First offs, Cheering. How dare them agree to break the tradition about the 'Squad'. Honestly, if I knew it would be that pathetic, I would have stayed at home and sleep. If it just weren't for RJ, Yana, Chino, Ricky, Kenneth, and Neel, I could've left the show and went home. It was the lamest ever! The hosts, please! It was a show, and they could have, at least, gotten people who could actually host! And not to mention the results, I honestly think that the College of Engineering and Design deserved something better than being the second runner-up only. Tss.

Second, the Miss Silliman. My God, please! What ever happened to the "Miss Silliman should be embodied by someone who has the brain and beauty"? Okay, nuf said.

React if you like. Kill me for this if you wish. I don't care because I know you'll say, "You don't know because you're not a part of the organizing committee and you have no idea how hard it's like to blah blah blah blah blah". And I'll tell you, "Back off because you don't even know how it feels like to be me, how every nanometer of pain I am feeling right now! It's not enough that you love me for who I am, you should also love me for what I'm not. So please, get a life!".

O di ba, far out.

I'd Rather Not.

2008-08-28T03:52:00.000+08:00

Why am I making this trip a big deal?

You see, you won't even notice I'm gone. And as if I'm not coming back!

Pesteh. Puh-lease!

Where?

2008-08-24T00:19:00.000+08:00

I've already booked myself a two-way flight, so I guess I'm finally going(?). This is going to be very exciting because I'll be alone - travel alone, live alone, go to places alone. Hala, can I do this?

I could still remember that, once, I had this "dream" of living in ******. Imagine the parties every night, the malls, the everything-that's-not-in-Dooms. But when I matured a bit, I think it's more than what I used to believe what ****** is all about. I think what's most important is the experience and the exposure.

I remember myself inquiring online at this prestigious school in ******, and filling up their application form for transferees. But I never had the chance to pass my form because... wala. Maybe it wasn't just for me, I thought. But if I just had the confidence and the will power, my life could have been much better. I could have learned how to be independent. My life could have been much much much more different than my messed-up life right now.

But this is it! I'm finally doing something I think is best for me. I'm finally pushing through my plans step-by-step. I'm finally going, not because I want to experience how it is like to party in ******, not because I want to go shopping, and surely not because I want to escape the fudge-up situations here in Dooms. I am going because I want to learn, I want to be exposed, and I want to experience how it is like to be independent for a few days.

I know my life won't change because of this, but this could definitely be the start.

So here's to September 6, 2008! Cheers! =)

Danger.

2008-08-21T00:46:00.000+08:00

I won't care anymore if some people will get affected with my posts because I don't have time to deal with pea-sized-brain people. But nonetheless, I still have to be more careful on what I will blog about. I'm still learning how to blog safely. Safely as in, not spilling too much information and/or emotions because a paragraph of entry could lead to an i'm-not-speaking-with you-anymore situation. Please, to what use did I open a blog for? As my blog description goes, "I Blog To Express, And Not To Impress". You see, there's a thin line between "blogging to express" and "blogging to impress". I'm writing this because instead of expressing what I honestly feel, I would rather hold back because I still have to think on how others' might think. Wala nalang unta ko nag-blog kung dili ra pud diay nako masulat akong ganahan masulat.

Fine, if people do not like what I'm writing here in my blog, then no one is stopping them to click the red button at the upper right corner of their browser, right? Simple, dumbass.

-------------------------------

Okay, enough of that.

I know it's been quite sometime that I have not really updated on what's really happening with my life lately, and I bet you already know the reason why (If you're a 'wise' reader). School's been a bitch lately, and I have been too with school. And since midterms are over, then it's now time for me to "double time".

Classes are resuming on September 1, since it is our University's foundation day on the 28th, and activities are starting to boil up tomorrow. Open house. Torch parade. Hibalag (booth area). Miss Silliman. Parada Sillimaniana. Cheering competition. Whoa, same-same. Nothing new, as usual. But still, they're still something to look forward to. It's what every Sillimanian is getting excited for every August. Tss.

By the way, I died during my Physics exam this morning. And I know I'll die again when I get my testpaper back.

Please Get A Life. Puh-lease!

2008-08-17T20:47:00.000+08:00

There's a lot to blog about right now.
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
But I can't because some people are making everything a big deal. Kapoy na.

Please don't make me shut this blog down because you have no idea how hard it is to start all over again.

Please Pray After Reading This.

2008-08-12T02:58:00.000+08:00

The other week, I was browsing through my fone's calendar and took note of some friends' coming birthday.

August 6. Tara Santelices. Someone I met way way before. I checked my fonebook, and I still have her number.

I was really planning to greet her on her birthday because we haven't communicated for quite a while. It would be a good start for a conversation, I thought. I will, hopefully, be going to Manila next month for the convention, and I was planning to meet up with her, since I can't remember anymore the last time we saw each other.

August 5. I was busy the whole day, because my classes ended at 7PM. I forgot about Tara's birthday.

August 6. Tara's birthday. I forgot to greet her in the morning, and so I planned to greet her in the evening instead. Afternoon, at around 3PM, I got a text from a common friend saying that Tara was shot by some evil person at around 1 in the morning and that Tara needs all our prayers. I couldn't describe what I was feeling that time.

She was shot on her birthday? How? Why? What exactly happened? I texted back and asked the details.

According to my friend, the jeep Tara and her bestfriend were riding on their way home was held-up and when Tara refused to give her bag with her laptop inside, the evil man shot her IN THE HEAD. She's in critical condition.

God, please. I hate situations like this. I hate the feeling when I know someone is fighting for his/her life. I just hate it, specially when he/she is innocent.

Tara has always been in my prayers since that day I received the text message. I couldn't contact anyone close to her right now. I don't know anyone of her family, her inner circle, her classmates. Wala. It's sad to know that I can not visit her in the hospital either.

I can only pray for her. That's all I can do, and I know that's all Tara and her family needs right now.

I was doing my rounds this evening and I saw this from Saab's blog. I didn't know she knows Tara too.

Please read this, and you'll realize how evil some people around us are.

This entry was taken from the blog of Ms. Lacsamana, a Filipino teacher from Assumption Antipolo. I got goosebumps when I read the last part. :( Btw, I don’t know Tara personally but her sister was my friend from gradeschool. Let’s continue our prayers.

“Kararating ko lang galing Medical City. Dinalaw namin at ipinagdasal si Tara. Kasama ko sina Sir Louie Lorenzo, Sir Lito Jimenez, Ms. Taks Clarete, Ms Ettie Miranda at Ms. Rorie Francisco.

Halos mapuno ang pasilyo ng ospital dahil sa mga nakapilang mga tao na nais makita si Tara. Nagtataka ang ilang nars dahil ang daming bisita ni Tara. Di nakatiis ang isang nars at nagtanong kung kaanu-ano namin si Tara. Sabi namin ” dati naming estudyante.” Ang sagot ng aming kausap ay ” ang dami niyang bisita hanggang kahapon.” Isang matipid na ngiti at sabay sabing ” oo, dahil marami ang nagmamahal kay Tara.”

Niyakap kami ni Lila, ang kapatid ni Tara na naging estudyante rin namin. Pinauna kami na makapasok sa ICU upang tingnan si Tara. Dala-dalawa lang ang maaaring makapasok sa ICU at sa labas lamang ng kuwarto na may salamin mo makikita si Tara. Sa ganoong sitwasyon sari-saring emosyon ang iyong mararamdaman. Mahirap at masakit sa loob na makita ang dati mong estudyante sa ganoong kalagayan. Halos maga na ang kanyang ulo na may benda. Malakas ang kanyang paghinga sa tulong ng respirator. Halos nakalabas ang itim na bahagi ng mata dahil na rin sa bala ng baril na nasa kanyang utak. Kausap namin ang kanyang ina at isinalaysay ang tunay na nangyari. 10% lang ang tsansa kung maooperahan siya. Ang bala ng baril ay “double action.” Ibig sabihin nito ay maliliit na bahagi ng bala ay nakakalat sa kanyang utak. Mahirap at maselan ang operasyon dahil iisa-isahing tanggalin ang maliit na bahagi ng bala.

Nagpakilala ako sa kanyang ina at sinabi ko na ako ang teacher-in-charge (IV-3 batch 2003) ni Tara. Tinanong ko siya kung ano ba talaga ang nangyari. Iba kasi ang mga naglalabasang balita.

Siya namang dating ni Joee, bestfriend ni Tara. Isinalaysay ni Joee ang tunay na nangyari. Birthday ni Tara ng Agosto 6. Nag-text sa kanya si Tara na magkita sa “Burger King” sa Marcos Highway. Galing pa si Joee sa CSB, Taft Ave. Napagkasunduan nilang hintayin ang 12:00 ng madaling araw upang ipagdiwang ang 23 kaarawan ni Tara. Matapos ang 12:00 ng madaling araw ay sumakay sila ng dyip pauwi ng Cainta, Rizal. Sila lang ang sakay ng dyip. Pahinto-hinto ang dyip upang magsakay ng pasahero. Hanggang may isang lalaki na sumakay sa dyip na umupo sa tabi ni Tara sa bandang hulihan. Pababa ang lalaki ng agawin ang bag ni Tara. Naghatakan sila sa bag. Nakarinig na lang ng putok si Joee na nakaupo sa tabi ni Tara. Nang tingnan niya si Tara, ito pala ang nabaril at sa ulo mismo. Sinabi ni Joee sa driver na dalhin sila sa malapit na ospital. Bago pa sila makarating sa malapit na klinika ay binaba pa isa-isa ang mga pasahero. Halos isang oras bago sila nakarating. Pagkahatid sa klinika ay iniwan na sila ng drayber. Tinanggihan ng klinika na tanggapin si Tara dahil hindi nila kayang gamutin. Naghintay pa si Joee ng mahabang sandali upang tulungan sila ng mga nars na tumawag ng taxi at dalhin sa Eulogio “Amang ” Rodriguez Hospital si Tara. Isipin na lang na 5’ 2 ang taas ni Joee at siya pa ang nagbuhat kay Tara. Di na makausap ni Joee si Tara nang nasa EAR hospital. Tinawagan niya ang mga magulang ni Tara at kanyang mga magulang upang ipaalam ang mga pangyayari.

Nakalulungkot isipin na buhay na ang nakabingit ay parang walang pakialam ang mga pasahero ng dyip na nagpababa pa sa kani-kanilang destinasyon. Ikalawa, kung di pa sumigaw si Joee upang magpatulong sa mga nars sa klinika na kanilang napuntahan na tumawag ng taksi upang dalhin sa pinakamalapit na ospital ay di pa kikilos. Siya pa ang nagbuhat kay Tara upang isakay sa taksi.

Medyo masakit at sariwa pa kay Joee ang mga pangyayari kaya di na kami nagtanong pa. Pumunta kami sa waiting area at nakita namin ang ama ni Tara. Tinawag namin ang mga kaibigan, kaklase at mga mahal sa buhay ni Tara upang manalangin. Sa pangunguna ni Ms. Taks Clarete ay ipinagdasal namin si Tara.

Pagkatapos ng limang (5) taon ay nagkita-kita kami ng aking mga dating mag-aaral at TIC class. Nakalulungkot ang sabi ng isang mag-aaral: "Ms, dito pa tayo nag-reunion.”
Sabi ko sa ilang mga dati kong estudyante na noong Agosto 1, bigla na lang sumulpot si Tara sa facebook at humihiling na i-add ko siya. Nang mabalitaan ko ang nangyari sa kanya ay tiningnan ko ang kanyang facebook profile. Sinulatan ko siya sa kanyang ‘wall’ dahil kaarawan niya. Di ko alam kung ano ang ibig niyang sabihin sa kanyang “recent activity” na nakasulat sa facebook: "Tara Bosch Santelices is chasing analog ghosts.” Ikinuwento ko sa kanila na para siyang may premonisyon. Ang sagot ng ilan ay: “Miss, sa kanyang YM ay kanyang isinulat: “bullet through my head.”

Para sa iyo Tara, nandito kami …. nanalangin at nagbabantay sa iyong paggaling.”

It did as well, gave me goosebumps.

Get well soon Tar. I'll pray as hard as I can for you. I'll see you soon.

Happy 101st.

2008-08-07T01:50:00.000+08:00

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for tomorrow. The only thing I hate about it, is that I have to wear a semi-formal attire. And that means shoes.

But whatever it takes, I'm going for it. Wish me luck -- goodluck. =)

At Least.

2008-08-03T22:52:00.000+08:00

Can you be my miracle?

Let my world be a better place to live in. Please.

GTH, Miss.

2008-08-02T02:16:00.000+08:00

Contrary to what Dumaguete City is tagged as, "The City of Gentle People", I just found out that some people here won't go an extra mile to help others simply because they don't want to.

A few weeks ago, me and my cousin, Kim, went around the city to check on the shipping fees of different couriers here in Dooms. We were starting our business then, and we had to post the corresponding shipping fees for each region in the PI so it wouldn't be much of a hassle to our customers, of course.

And so, first stop, Air21. Their small office is located at the ground floor of the Ultra Vision Building.

We arrived there a little over 5PM, 5:05 perhaps. The office was already closed, but the door was still unlocked. We went inside thinking that we would be entertained since we won't be shipping anything. We were just there to ask for the rates, that's all. But the receptionist seemed to be annoyed by our presence and told us that she has no idea about the rates because she isn't the one assigned. "Igo ra man ko tig type", were her exact words.

Ok fine. So off we go. We can't blame her if she's only hired to do the typing. If that's her only job, then fine. But my point is, she could've told us the range or perhaps, she could've given us the estimated rate. Or maybe, she could've told us to wait for a while because she'll try to check it out first or something. The crap part is, with out thinking twice and with out hesitations, she told us right away that she couldn't help us. Or I think, she DIDN'T want to help us.

Then this afternoon, we had to ship some Kimonos to a customer in Misamis, which is, by the way, our second shipping so far. To my surprise, the girl who refused to help us because "tig type lang siya", was the one who 'entertained' us and everything. Hmmmm. So you're only hired to type, huh? And worse, she knew how to rate the package because they had this book where all the rates are listed.

I wanted to kick her face right there and then.

Just For Now.

2008-08-01T21:22:00.000+08:00

I feel so sorry for my blog. But I need to do this. ='(

I wanna cry. I am so desperate.

Promise.

2008-07-30T02:18:00.000+08:00

I want to do a lot of things, and I know I have all the time in the world to do them. But the problem is, sometimes, some things aren't just for me. Thus, it would make me feel deprived from something I really want. But funny as it may sound, but sometimes, it's myself who tend to deprive things that I want and like. I don't know how it works, but that's what I've come to realize these past few days. I pull down my own self, and yet I still blame other things for it. More often than not, opportunities are already right under my nose, and yet I 'pretend' I didn't see them coming.

But this time, I'm not going to let anything nor anyone stop me from doing what I want and need to do.

I don't want to go to sleep thinking what it could've been. So I better take this shot now, or never. It's going to be for me, because this is what I want.

September 06, 2008 is to die for. I'd die if I won't make it. PRAMIS!

Just Imagine.

2008-07-27T17:17:00.000+08:00

I can not take this anymore. I held back, only because I never wanted to cross the line. But this is enough. If I lose everything after speaking and standing up for myself, then so be it. It may be painful expressing this, but it has been very painful ever since. I just have to do this for myself, of course, because I am not happy with what's happening anymore. I have kept my silence, only because I thought it will still be fixed. But situations like this has to come to an end, right?

I have always been fair, God knows that. All I wanted is to have people in my life who will treat me right, and fair as well. It saddens me because all I want is a simple life, and it's so hard for me to have one.

Once and for all, I am going to take this issue against you.

And oh, by the way, thank you for bursting my bubble.

It's Never Enough.

2008-07-26T04:50:00.000+08:00

Happy Fiesta, Tanjay!

Here we come!

Thanks *friends*, for making it more fun!

I'm never trading you guys for anything else. =)

It's morphing time!

Shift Key.

2008-07-24T05:22:00.000+08:00

Let's make our lives easy.

If you're done with step 1, proceed to step 4.

Surviving.

2008-07-24T00:35:00.000+08:00

So maybe some of you are wondering why I'm contented with 2-4 lines of entry lately.

And yeah, that is the reason why I don't have time to write long posts.

As I enter in this new venture, I am very excited and scared as well.
Scared, because it might not give me the chance to write anymore. Ever.

But nonetheless, wish us luck! Thank you!

By the way, it's just lately that I realized that compressing everything you want to write in just 2-4 sentences is the hardest thing in writing.

Will I?

2008-07-22T01:29:00.000+08:00

Let's flip a coin. Heads, I won't let go. Tails, let's flip the coin again.

Game?